Arrow Season 6 Episode 2 – TV Review
Diggle’s one valuable contribution to this show: swoleness.
Where’s Katie?
I only came here for Katie.
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Arrow Season 6 Episode 1 – TV Review
Dynasty needs all the help it can get.
I’m only still here for Katie Cassidy.
And the occasional male shirtlessness.
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Arrow Season 5 Episode 23 – TV Review
#Unsinkable
Felicity, Olicity, and Curtis aside, this is a pretty respectable season finale.
If only it had, like, stakes and stuff.
You know. Tension.
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Arrow Season 5 Episode 20 – TV Review
That’s because it is, baby.
At least Felicity finally apologises for that time she broke up with Oliver because he didn’t confer with her about decisions to protect the life of his son who he didn’t know about until five seconds ago and don’t involve her in any way and she was so mad about it she overcame paralysis to literally walk away from him.
Isn’t that a fun memory?
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Arrow Season 4 Episode 15 – TV Review
Just how much can the Olicity apologists endure?
You’d think that an episode featuring another CW superhero, the crippling of Damien Dahrk, and the fruition of Black Boss’ Lian Yu digging expedition wouldn’t end in a selfish tirade from Felicity “We Can’t Excuse Her By Saying ‘Well, it was in the comics'” Smoak.
But you’d be wrong.
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Arrow Season 4 Episode 14 – TV Review
Move over, Deborah.
Yeah, Donna and Quentin are older people.
But they’re CW older people. Which means they’re still goddamn smokin’.
And can you believe a Quentin and Donna episode is bearable?
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Arrow Season 4 Episode 13 – TV Review
As long as it isn’t Roy.
The conflict of this episode hinges on whether or not Malcolm cares about Thea as his daughter.
You’d think seasons’ worth of proof that he does would be enough to keep his character consistent.
But you’d be wrong.
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TV Review: Gossip Girl Season 6 Episode 10
You think that’s a spoiler? Bitch, please. Read on.
I’m gonna apply the same rules to this post as I did to the PLL super-awesome-mega revelations episode:
Seriously, I post mad spoilers, bro. And this episode, the final of Gossip Girl ever, has some pretty huge-ass spoilers.
So for your own good, go fucking watch this episode before you continue reading. You will definitely regret it if you don’t.
Now, shall we?
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Film Review: Snow White & The Huntsman
“Wha? Twilight’s ending? Kristen sad! I have to actually say that I’m sad, because my face is incapable of portraying that emotion. Or any emotion.”
Oh. God.
I have been looking forward to making fun of this for so long. In fact, I already have.
So you can imagine my disappointment when I found out it really isn’t that terrible.
There is no justice in this world.
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Film Review: American Pie: Reunion
“Yeah, I just triple bra them and try not to breathe or change my centre of gravity. Works great. Makes Kat Dennings look like shit.”
Oh come now, Jennifer. She doesn’t need your help for that.
So did anyone notice I haven’t posted anything for over a week?
No?
Oh.
Well, if you were wondering, I was on a cruise. Yes, I did eat everything. Yes, I regret everything. No, I didn’t use the fucking gym. It was about as big as my bedroom (I’m not rich, FYI) and every wall was a mirror. It was like they were actively discouraging you from using it.
Anyway, seeing as this is my reunion with you, I’d review the American Pie: Reunion.
