Tag Archive | The Armory

The Vampire Diaries Season 8 Episode 2 – TV Review

TVD Today Will Be Different Sarah Salvatore Damon

Sarah Salvatore wasn’t why we liked Season 6, idiot.

Bring back Kai, then we’ll talk.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 22 – TV Review

TVD Gods and Monsters Bonnie gun

The last time wasn’t as angsty, though.

I’m in two minds about this episode.

For one, it’s the finale, so we can finally say goodbye to this fuck-awful season and live in the glorious bubble of hope that next season will be so much better. Remember how much better Season 6 was after the abysmal ending of Season 5?

But on the other hand, this episode is a huge pile of vomit that is an embarrassment to the stellar (save for Season 5, you know) legacy of TVD finales.

Let’s just do this and then get the fuck outta here.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 21 – TV Review

TVD Requiem For A Dream Damon Bonnie fight

“Come at me, Bon,” at least.

Well neither Bonnie the Vampie Slayer, nor the Giant Space Flea From Nowhere from the vault have formed as a true final boss for the season.

Which means the finale will either rush through one, or stretch them out to go into next season.

Everybody loses.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 20 – TV Review

TVD Kill 'Em All Yvette corpse

“Nah, it’s cool. Just wake me up when she is.”

It’s a sad day when I, a card-carrying Elena hater, think her return would be better than suffering the tripe we’ve been getting in her absence.

Or, preferably, Katherine.

Actually, just Katherine, please, Nina.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 19 – TV Review

TVD Somebody That I Used To Know Bonnie gun

Spread the word. Please.

The very episode following my bitch and moan about TVD not allowing human drama between its characters, and now we’ve got some potent (if rushed) human drama between its characters.

My complaining changes all our lives for the better.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 16 – TV Review

TVD Days of Future Past Damon poisoned

We’re all just drunk and waiting for The Originals to come on.

And, thanks to a pleasantly insane CW, TVD will be shambling on to a season 8.

Not even Nina Dobrev can save us now.

Because she abandoned this leaky boat, bitch.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 15 – TV Review

TVD I Would For You Rayna chopped up

So Mystic Falls does have hacksawsl.

The amazing, resurrecting Rayna Cruz turns out to be surprisingly easy to dispatch, after all.

But doing so would mean the death of a TVD loved one.

So, two birds, one stone, right?

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The Vampire Diaries Season 7 Episode 14 – TV Review

TVD Moonlight on the Bayou Bonnie axe Enzo

And Bonnie does get pretty spicy with that axe.

After letting Arrow and The Flash (and Legends of Tomorrow. And Vixen?) get away with crossovers while they sat on their hands, it’s time for the TVD-verse shows to finally unite for two connected episodes.

Will The Vampire Diaries be buoyed by the current good run of its spin-off sister, or will it shine even duller in pale comparison?

Oh, honey. Have you even been watching this season? Duller, obviously.

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