Tag Archive | Serpents

Riverdale Season 3 Episode 17 – TV Review

Riverdale The Raid Hermione wine

Except I drink white, not red. Ain’t nobody got time for all those antioxidants.

I know this is going to sound crazy, but can you believe that the Betty segments are the only good things about this episode?

It’s got to be a first!

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Riverdale Season 3 Episode 14 – TV Review

Riverdale Fire Walk With Me Betty

Riverdale couldn’t even wait until Season 5 to be bad enough for me to make that joke. For shame.

Remember the resolution I made last episode to just grimly soldier on through this travesty of a season?

This is me. Soldiering.

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Riverdale Season 3 Episode 13 – TV Review

Riverdale Requiem for a Welterweight Betty crying

And it was so good, too.

They say thirteen is unlucky for some.

But Riverdale’s out of its damn mind if it thinks it can blame bad luck on what a colossal turd this episode is.

You made this bed yourself, bitch. You did this.

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Riverdale Season 3 Episode 9 – TV Review

Riverdale No Exit Archie shirtless

And I’m just not sure if it’s enough.

The truth is, this post was delayed because I actually had something to do in the real world there for a while.

But I’d be equally happy to say that it was because I just don’t care about Riverdale, anymore.

Because I just don’t care about Riverdale, anymore.

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Riverdale Season 3 Episode 1 – TV Review

Riverdale Labor Day Archie shirtless

When I said I wanted Season 3 to go back to basics, this is exactly what I meant.

Step aside, wannabe-Riverdale. The real, ab-flaunting deal has returned.

Also, levitating babies.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 22 – TV Review

Riverdale Brave New World Kevin Moose kiss

It’s a gay off.

Despite Kevin and Moose finally getting it together after all this time, this episode has nowhere near the sense of culmination that the Season 1 finale did.

Probably because Season 1 was a slight-to-moderately heightened teen soap opera, whereas Season 2 is this blood-drenched, gangland nonsense, serial killer pit of darkness.

Reel it in, Season 3. Reel it in.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 21 – TV Review

Riverdale Judgement Night The Killing of a Sacred Deer Cheryl archer

But, like, yeah. It is.

At multiple points in my notes for this episode I wrote “This episode is too fucking much.”

Which for Riverdale is exactly the right amount.

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