It’s pretty bad that realising Dynasty’s mid-season finale won’t be until next week was actually the second worst realisation I had this week.
The worst was that I finally realised what present day Riverdale has been reminding me of:
Revenge Season 2.
Jesus Christ, CW. Reel it in. If Revenge can come back from international terrorist syndicates and goofy hackers, then I have faith you can survive this endless, evil board game.
Archie tied up and defenseless (and shirtless) is a good start to the episode.
Probably could have done without the forcible branding of tabletop RPG symbols onto him. Underground fight clubs were one thing, but burning inmates with hot metal pokers is too far, man.
Now the makeup department’s going to have to remember that for continuity every time Archie takes his shirt off. And that’s a lot.
Get your nostalgia goggles on and prepare to be confused what decade you’re in, as we get the hotly awaited flashback episode where all our main teen cast portray their parents in the 90s, but the show kind of forgets and instead thinks it’s an 80s reference episode.
But the lewks are delish, so it’s okay.
And amidst all the crazy cult theatrics and juvenile detention-based fight clubs in this episode, the thing I had the most difficulty believing was that Veronica’s speakeasy doesn’t serve alcohol.
So let me get this straight: it’s a bar, but it doesn’t serve alcohol, its staff and clientele are children, and by all observations it doesn’t have any alternate exits?
Veronica’s lucky she didn’t need to have any investors, because that would have been one gnarly pitch meeting.