So this is week 2 of The Betty-only Report.
And with the other subplots this week being almost comically bad (what the fuck even was the point of Veronica’s?), I feel like things are going to stay this way for a while.
Unless I give in to the truth buried deep inside and just throw Riverdale in the bin. Fucking hell, I’m close.
About halfway through this episode I realised I’d finally fucking had it, and had decided I’d be throwing Riverdale into the Discontinued pile where it belongs (and, if we’re being honest with ourselves, has belonged for a long time).
But Betty, her radiant self, has brought me to a compromise: I’m only going to cover her from now on.
No more Archie and his gym/community centre bullshit. No more Veronica and her relentless, eye-rollingly ridiculous mafia crap. And now with Jughead at some arbitrary private (and apparently boarding?) school, no more of that shit, either.
Just Betty being the only character left on this show with a shred of empathy.
And Chad Michael Murray with his shirt mostly off. Let’s not forget about that.
Despite Kevin and Moose finally getting it together after all this time, this episode has nowhere near the sense of culmination that the Season 1 finale did.
Probably because Season 1 was a slight-to-moderately heightened teen soap opera, whereas Season 2 is this blood-drenched, gangland nonsense, serial killer pit of darkness.
Reel it in, Season 3. Reel it in.
But don’t get too excited just yet.
There’s a still a whole lotta Lodge mafia family bullshit, character inconsistency, and even some fresh twinanigans.
But you know what I realised today? At least we’re not dealing with Serpent drama, anymore.
And for that, I’m grateful.