Tag Archive | New Sheriff

Riverdale Season 3 Episode 11 – TV Review

Riverdale The Red Dahlia Betty Penelope

I assume it’s just as dark and grim as Penelope’s lair.

This episode is just really exhausting, you guys.

And I truly want to believe that this avalanche of exposition is Riverdale clearing the decks so we can move forward.

But can we really trust that?

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Scream Season 2 Episode 12 – TV Review

Scream When a Stranger Calls Brooke Noah

And don’t get renewed, for God’s sake.

You know, I had to really suck up my pride to pretend that Scream’s first season wasn’t that bad. Pathetic finale and all.

But Season 2 has been a lot choppier than Season 1. So you’d think they’d at least throw me a bone for the finale (and, with its piss-poor ratings, likely the series finale), right?

Fucking. Wrong.

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Scream Season 2 Episode 10 – TV Review

Scream The Vanishing Noah stabbed

Our prayers have been… briefly glimpsed at?

No, Noah doesn’t die. Scream wouldn’t be that kind to us.

But we do get a semi-important cast death this episode. One of the ones on my list from last episode.

And Scream even remembers that they skipped the Audrey/Emma throwdown last episode, and instead gives us the awkwardly delayed version of it this week.

Things are looking up.

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Scream Season 2 Episode 9 – TV Review

Scream The Orphanage Lesbait dead

Libby from Sabrina but without the fabulousness?

Just kidding. I know who it is. It’s Lesbait.

She doesn’t have a real name, does she?

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Scream Season 2 Episode 8 – TV Review

Scream Village of the Damned Brooke drinking

Take me to Drown Town, Brooke.

I didn’t have a very perceptive week last week.

I thought Scream had only three, including this one, episodes left to go. And I was okay with that.

But now we’ve got four left, not including this one.

So kill a main cast member al-fucking-ready. Jesus.

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Scream Season 2 Episode 7 – TV Review

Scream Let the Right One In Emma Kieran

“I’m sorry, but Eli’s clear mental instability is more attractive.”

EDIT: A dutiful commenter has pointed out a couple of mistakes I made in this review. I thank them for their service, and thank you, dear reader, for internally deriding me. I will mark the errors below.

With only three episodes to go (EDIT: It’s five, actually)  after this one, Scream remembers that hey, it wasted time building up a pig farm nightmare backstory, so why not put all the eggs in that basket?

Because that basket is shit, baby. That’s why.

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Scream Season 2 Episode 5 – TV Review

Scream Dawn of the Dead Kieran

Wait, I’ve got a better one:
“or Justin Bieber after a testosterone injection”

Goddamn, PLL. Scream’s even pulling off filler episodes better than you, now.

Will the embarrassment never end?

Well, we’re talking about PLL. So no.

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