Tag Archive | luke

The Guest – Film Review

The Guest Dan Stevens shirtless

He can be my guest any day.

After the phenomenal It Follows, I had high hopes for The Guest. It has a similar, 80s throwback style to it; director Adam Wingard’s previous film was the above-average slasher You’re Next; and Dan Stevens has ditched doughy Matthew Crawley and gotten cut as fuck.

Well, I suppose I deserve to be punished for my optimism.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 13 – TV Review

TVD The Day I Tried To Live Caroline Stefan ship

Sadly, the attempt is not successful.

No, Bonnie is still hanging on.

But you’ve gotta give the little bitch points for effort.

At least she wants to kill herself. It’s a step in the right direction.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 12 – TV Review

I figured out a solution to our “Kai is attracted to Elena” dilemma, by the way: bring Katherine back and let him chase after her, instead.

Kai and Katherine together would be almost too fantastic to handle.

Such ruthless bitchiness the world has never seen.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 11 – TV Review

TVD Woke Up With A Monster Kai

Especially when he’s so refreshingly evil.

The bad news, Kai might be straight. Because he totally flirts with Elena this episode.

The good news is, Nina Dobrev is ridiculously good-looking, so maybe I’ll just give him this one.

The hope isn’t dead yet.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 10 – TV Review

TVD Christmas Through Your EyesKai Alaric

Kai’s used to having phallic objects pressed against his face.

The anti-magic zone on Mystic Falls is gone.

It’s a Christmas miracle.

Kai is the gift-giver that keeps on giving.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 8 – TV Review

TVD Liam eye roll Fade Into You Friendsgiving Thanksgiving

I’m just as confused and eye-rolly as you, Liam.

I really wish Elena would just compel him to fuck off or something.

Oh, she does?

Well, now.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 3 – TV Review

TVD Welcome to Paradise Elena Jeremy lake swimwear

I’ll take one order of Jeremy’s abs and Elena’s booty shorts.

Oh, now I remember why Jeremy is still on this show.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 6 Episode 1 – TV Review

TVD Elena Damon season 6 premiere herb

Griefer Madness.

Yes, while some choose to accept their grief, Elena decides to chop hers up in a bowl, instead.

Because the only thing missing from the Elena Cavalcade of Melodramatic Issues was “drug addict.”

Season 6: ticking the boxes.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 5 Episode 22 – TV Review

TVD Elena Caroline Home

Those were the good days.

Much like Gossip Girl, it seems The Vampire Diaries isn’t handling its 5th season too admirably, either.

Well, at least not since the death of Katherine.

It doesn’t help that the season finale of TVD’s spin-off was about 20 times better than this, either.

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The Vampire Diaries Season 5 Episode 21 – TV Review

TVD Stefan dying dead Promised Land

And having your heart ripped out is absolutely no excuse.

Typical Stefan. Way to check out just as you’re needed.

Why don’t you go lie in a safe at the bottom of a river for another 3 months.

At least you’ll be dead this time, so you won’t have to bore us with your post-drowning whingeing.

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