After all my bitching about it, I never thought I’d actually be sad to see Jersey go.
And no, I didn’t cry buckets for them. Because my tear ducts are actually laced with cobra venom (long story) and it would be terribly dangerous to let that stuff slip.
But yeah, seeing these 8 alcoholic, untalented losers leave the place that made them famous was truly heart-rending.
Also, scrotum cake.
Christmas is my favourite holiday.
It’s the most acceptable time of the year to get shit-faced. Next to New Year’s. And St Patrick’s Day. And my birthday. And Wednesdays. And-
Actually, Christmas wins because you get alcohol AND presents. There.