Tag Archive | david

Once Upon a Time Season 6 Episode 3 – TV Review

OUaT The Other Shoe Queenie Alyssa Edwards

You know the sound that comes next.

I know this episode is supposed to be about Cinderella. But, like, who cares?

Forget it, people. It’s Queenie Town.

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Once Upon a Time Season 6 Episode 2 – TV Review

OUaT A Bitter Draught Queenie fan

Por que no los dos?

Queenie Fabulosity Watch, Week 2: Queenie is still fabulous.

End of review.

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Once Upon a Time Season 6 Episode 1 – TV Review

OUaT Savior Queenie yas queen

I only came here for her. And Sam Witwer’s hot face.

Do yourself a favour and just skip to the final forty seconds of this episode.

It takes Queenie that long to show up, but by God, her appearance more than redeems a plodding, mangled episode.

I fear to think what we would do without her.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episodes 22 and 23 – TV Review

OUaT Only You Mr Hyde Sam Witwer

“Whaddya mean Penny Dreadful got there first?”

No apologies for this late review. I can barely muster any shits to give about Once Upon a Time, anymore.

My last note for this episode was merely “At least Sam Witwer is hot.”

He can crash down in me any day.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 19 – TV Review

OUaT Sisters Cruella James

Then why is the episode titled “Sisters?”

The episode is titled “Sisters” because James gets thrown away like trash, while Zelena and Regina come together over a just-mentioning-it-now magical contrivance. Courtesy of Cora.

Who goes to Heaven.

So yeah, not a good episode.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 18 – TV Review

OUaT Ruby Slippers lesbian kiss

See? I remember things I did in the past.

Well, poor Mulan. She finds the only other lesbian-leaning character in Once Upon a Time, and then loses her to another sudden lesbian.

I thought it was only the gay male community that were all “No Asians?”

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 15 – TV Review

OUaT The Brothers Jones David Cruella

And David is no substitute for a real man, but again, we’re desperate, here.

The good news is that Cruella’s still around.

The bad news is that Once Upon a Time is doubling down on last episode’s pointless, minor character sob/backstory schtick by bringing back Hook’s brother. Who is even less valuable to events than Gold’s slutty wife.

All the dead characters in the world to choose from, and we get Bernard Curry. Good grief.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 13 – TV Review

OUaT Labor of Love Cruella

But read “bark” as in, like, an over-exaggerated “back” in a fancy British accent.
Also, dog pun.

With Cora out of the way, I was worried we’d have to suffer a Fabulous Bitch Goddess vacuum.

Regina is way too friendly these days. And as camptacular as Queenie is in the flashbacks, she can’t affect anything important happening now.

So thank God OUaT threw us a bone with Cruella. After her “in car form only” snubbing last week, I didn’t expect it.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 12 – TV Review

OUaT Souls of the Departed Queenie

How can a show be both horribly desperate, and renewed for a sixth season at the same time?

Yes, for the second episode in a row (three month hiatus not withstanding), Once Upon a Time has had to lean on our enduring goodwill for Queenie.

She’s the only thing that’s actually gotten better with time on Once Upon a Time.

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Once Upon a Time Season 5 Episode 4 – TV Review

OUaT The Broken Kingdom Regina red dress

You tell ’em, Regina.

It’s only the very next episode after a David episode, and here we go again, except this time with Snow taking charge, too.

Well, actually, it’s a more of a Guinevere and Lancelot episode. With deus ex machina magic.

I can’t tell. Is that better or worse than a David and Snow episode?

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