Tag Archive | caleb

Bates Motel Season 5 Episode 2 – TV Review

I hope Madeline the hardware store girl is into women.

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Bates Motel Season 5 Episode 1 – TV Review

Bates Motel Dark Paradise Norma murder

No scenery is safe from the chew of Norma Bates.

Did you really think death would keep Norma down?

And now she doesn’t even have to pretend to be civil. Because homicidal alter-egos don’t have to keep up appearances.

She’s off the leash.

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Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 10 – TV Review

PLL The DArkest Knight Hanna knife

Remember, Hanna: it’s down the road, not across the street.

I’m rough on Pretty Little Liars. A lot.

But I feel like I can’t overstate just how amazingly pathetic this episode is.

The phrase “has become a parody of itself” is often thrown around with too much abandon. But trust me, PLL has motherfucking earned it.

What a shocking waste of a show.

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Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 8 – TV Review

PLL Exes and OMGs Hanna

No, Hanna. Don’t become self-aware. It’s too depressing.

Just FYI, if there’s a noticeable lack of passion in this review, it’s because all my frustration has been driven towards the abysmal Scream season finale.

PLL: only looking (minimally) better when something else around it falls off a fucking cliff.

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Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 4 – TV Review

PLL Hit and Run Run Run Spencer drunk

Spencer’s evidently been watching PLL.

So PLL already solves its flash forward mystery by only four episodes in, and even features a genuine emotional conflict?

What is this? Opposite week?

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Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 2 – TV Review

PLL Bedlam Hanna red dress

Because Hanna can’t enjoy unemployment alone, now, can she?

Nothing important happens on the AD front.

Moving on.

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Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 1 – TV Review

PLL Tick-Tock, Bitches Aria Ezra hiding

At least PLL is staying true to itself.

Yes, I was foolish enough to hope that maybe, with one final season premiere to attempt, that PLL would somehow claw its way out of the swamp of bullshittery in which it has mired itself.

And again, it didn’t.

Sink ever lower, show.

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