Ciao, 2019 – Blog

It’s finally over. What is it with years in this decade ending in multiples of three being just the worst?

Nothing like ending the year on The Rise of Skywalker and Cats to leave a lasting taste in your mouth about 2019, huh?

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Riverdale – Discontinued

More like I’ll miss you only.

Maybe Alice, too.

I’m doing it. I’m standing up for myself.

Because what’s braver than complaining on an obscure blog about a TV show that has millions of fans and will never even know about me?

Nothing. Nothing’s braver.

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Dynasty Season 3 Episode 8 – TV Review

Don’t do it, CW! Dare to defy!

Did you really think Dynasty could get everyone into a courtroom and then resist trotting out the Alexis reveal?

And I’m so glad for their lack of willpower. Because it is camp, bitch.

Still kinda waiting for Nathalie Kelley to jump out of a box, though. That would be the gag of the entire series.

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Riverdale Season 4 Episode 8 – TV Review

We all know Alice would be unbeatable in the reading challenge.

There is hope yet for anyone who wants more out of Riverdale, as this episode mostly succeeds at the gargantuan task of trying to ground the drama across every subplot.

Sure, the episode winds down by still dipping its toe into this Stonewall Prep, every-Hardy-Boys-author-gets-murdered stupidity. But hey, at least the demonic doll is put to bed on the Cheryl front.

As for Betty? Not a lot on. So the Betty-only Report is gon’ be quick.

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Dynasty Season 3 Episode 7 – TV Review

I often joke about how this show is made for me. But, like, what if it actually was?

It was going to be a tough ask to compete with the Thanksgiving episodes of seasons past (could anything ever out-gay the Wizard of Oz fantasy sequence?), and this episode sadly doesn’t live up to those standards.

But goddamn, the closing scene got me in what I will happily proclaim is the gag of the season.

And with dreamy bedroom eyes Liam opening the episode, it’s not a bad sandwich. The turkey’s just a little dry in the middle. That’s all.

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Riverdale Season 4 Episode 7 – TV Review

I know I used this one recently, but hey, when the describing-a-piece-of-shit-CW-show shoe fits.

I’m basically taking a pass on this week’s episode.

Save for a last second reveal that I don’t care much about (and if we’re talking last second reveals, Riverdale ain’t got nothing on this week’s Dynasty), Betty’s only here to do legwork for Jughead’s stupid boarding school subplot.

Let’s get this shit on so we can go home.

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Dynasty Season 3 Episode 6 – TV Review

Isn’t it amazing that the gayest show on television also has the best heterosexual romance, too? God bless Dynasty.

After suffering through Nancy Drew and Riverdale each week, I’m so grateful to wash the taste of that shit out of my mouth with a cool, refreshing Dynasty.

I honestly don’t know what I’d do without it. It’s the only thing I genuinely look forward to each week.

Sorry, Supergirl. You gotta get it together, honey.

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