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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 17 – TV Review

Riverdale The Noose Tightens Toni Cheryl kiss

But I’ll give this one a pass because it’s atmospheric.

Who knew that in an episode about thwarting the evils of gay conversion that our true hope spot would be the realisation of just how pathetically fragile Hiram is, and the confirmation of Archie’s unfounded bravado?

It’s good to be back, Riverdale.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 16 – TV Review

Riverdale Primary Colors New Rules

Well, I guess that’s only one new rule. But it’s a good one.

Fetishistic lesbian slumber parties are an admirable first step, but don’t you think we could use a Molly Ringwald power moment and a dramatic, rain-soaked showdown between Archie and Jughead?

Oh, honey.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 15 – TV Review

Riverdale There Will Be Blood Archie shirtless

We’ll never say no to more shirtless Archie.

But don’t get too excited just yet.

There’s a still a whole lotta Lodge mafia family bullshit, character inconsistency, and even some fresh twinanigans.

But you know what I realised today? At least we’re not dealing with Serpent drama, anymore.

And for that, I’m grateful.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 14 – TV Review

Riverdale The Hills Have Eyes Betty hot tub drink

But get that parasol out of the way. It’s taking up valuable space that could be used to fit in more alcohol.

Riverdale the show apparently feels the same, too, as it continues to sip leisurely from a not-that-good cocktail and be dour and bitter.

The Season 2 blues are no joke.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 13 – TV Review

Riverdale The Tell-Tale Heart Betty vomit

I know she’s not hungover in this scene. But I didn’t want to miss a chance to talk about my vomit.

A similar sense of relief washed over me by the end of this episode, too.

After weeks of “huh” and “meh,” Riverdale finally makes the first move to pull itself out of the pits of second season mediocrity.

I could still use about 100% less land deal intrigue, though.

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 12 – TV Review

Riverdale The Wicked and the Divine Archie Kevin friendship

I’m sorry, Cheryl. But Riverdale has clearly forgotten about you.

It’s a shame that the above-captured sweetest moment of the episode is followed by the cringiest.

And not just of the episode, but of Riverdale’s run so far.

What’s happening, Riverdale?

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Riverdale Season 2 Episode 11 – TV Review

Riverdale The Wrestler Kevin

Like father, like son.

After last week’s tepid entry, Riverdale is back to form with an episode overflowing with homoerotic wrestling.

Sadly, not enough of it includes Kevin. But I can ‘mire from afar.

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