Anniversary 2020: The Top 5 TV Shows of the Past Year (For Whatever Reason) – Best Of

Oh, honey. This year’s anniversary posts are gonna be quick and to the point.

2020 is exhausting enough as it is.

And it works out, because it turns out my shortlist for this year’s picks was indeed very short. While I suspect part of it is because I’m becoming more and more of a jaded shithead as time goes on, I think this past year’s efforts just weren’t up to the standards of previous years.

See: Game of Thrones.

Also, see the following honourable mentions:

• On Becoming a God in Central Florida: Kirsten Dunst is fabulous. And I loved seeing Beth Ditto get up in that acting gig. What a great, weird little show.
• Into the Dark: Is it a show? Is it a collection of unrelated movies? Both. But I can tell you that it is (for the most part) just a lot of fun. And I have legitimately been bopping to the songs from My Valentine ever since February.
• Vagrant Queen: The cheap Canadian sci-fi show of my dreams. To have this much personality in only five episodes aired? Damn.
• Game of Thrones: Lol, I just realised I never got around to posting a review for Season 8. I mean, I watched it. But did I feel like spending an hour-ish writing about it? No, evidently.

But now, time for the realsies.

Scream

Sure, Riverdale was much, much worse. But Riverdale had been building that foundation of shit for years. Scream, on the other hand, while not being amazing for its first two seasons, at least had curated something of an identity for itself. Milquetoast it might have been.

But here comes a rebooted Season 3 to wipe all that away, and replace it with something even more offensively empty and inept. What a fucking waste.

I’ve been mad at Riverdale. A lot. But I was so much madder at Scream the TV Series for getting the opportunity to have another go at things (with the real mask this time!), and ending up such a wank.

Give me Emma and Brooke and, hell, even Audrey. Fuck you, show. You should have stayed unreleased forever.

May the curse not transfer to Scream 5. Fuck.

Dynasty

From the bottom to the top, baby.

Yes, for anyone familiar with this list over the past two years, there are no surprises here. Dynasty continues to be the absolute best thing on TV, and one of the few reasons to keep looking forward to living. Especially in these trying times (you knew I had to put it in here somewhere!).

Even a third recast for Cristal couldn’t keep this show from getting better and better, and gayer and gayer. Dynasty’s even doing musical numbers on the reg these days, and much better than fucking Riverdale.

Any other CW show I could not give less of a shit about, but it honestly pains me that Dynasty Season 3 is getting cut off two episodes short of its full season. With Fallon and Liam’s wedding looming for the grand finale, no less.

Please, please CW. Film and release these before moving on to Season 4. I need this. Genuinely, I need this.

Big Little Lies

Now we enter the “not covered on this blog” section of the list, and I just couldn’t go past Big Little Lies’ second season.

I know it was ages ago, but sometimes I’ll still just passingly remember what a vindictive, evil cunt Meryl Streep’s character was, and it’ll make me smile. I don’t think I’ve felt such intense hatred for a TV villain since, well, ever. That role could have easily been a cheese-fest pile of crap in the wrong hands, but when you’ve got Meryl at the wheel, you know you’re in for something truly memorable.

It’s a shame that the show otherwise went a bit limp in its second outing. Laura Dern’s meme queen outbursts not withstanding.

But if you’re going to watch a Rich Women Doing Stupid Melodramatic Shit show that takes itself deathly seriously, to delightful effect, this is the one.

Russian Doll

Not a lot to say on this one, other than goddamn I’m mad at myself for avoiding it for so long.

What I thought was just some overhyped on r/television Netflix show turned out to have one of the most emotionally affecting finales of the past year. After poo-poo-ing the thought of it for months, I finally found myself on Christmas night with nothing else to watch while I came down from my sugar high, and gave it a go.

I ploughed through it all that night, and was sobbing in joy at that final scene. I’ve loved Natasha Lyonne for a long time (Jessica in American Pie should be much more of an icon, and you all know it), and it was uplifting to see her get some recognition.

Schitt’s Creek

But baby, if we’re talking about emotional, joyous, and deserving of recognition, then let’s end this list with the brightest star of them all.

It’s a joke at this point that people will gush to you about the character development in Schitt’s Creek (except Moira. Arch and obtuse 4lyfe, bitch!), but it’s ubiquitous because it’s true. If the words “warm,” “wholesome,” and “rich girl doing little T-Rex hands while being condescending” metamorphosed into a TV show, then this is what you’d get.

Honestly, if you’re anything like me and were kind of put off by the silly title, please push through that. Patrick will, and I mean will, be your new husbando.

So that’s it, my loves. Will our favourite returning shows come back stronger after all this horror blows over? Will they come back at all?

Good god, they better. I don’t want to have to take up reading books or something. Yuck.