Dynasty Season 3 Episode 17 – TV Review
I must say, they had me in the first half when the episode was apparently going to overly centre on a fashion podcast.
But goddamn if Dynasty didn’t get me with yet another caper episode. That makes two in a row! And the reveal was even juicier this time, because it was all a complete surprise to me.
You rascally Carringtons.
TL;DR Fallon and Liam fake fight to trick Laura; Blake is in on it, too; and apparently also into Laura’s sexual advances; Cristal makes out with the hunky Chaplain; Culhane is disappointed to learn Vanessa was only manipulating him (or is she!?); Kirby and Ramy measure dicks over who is better friends with Sam.
I mean, is the prize really worth it? Is being a minor character in a fellow minor character’s minor subplots really worth the trouble?
So let’s get to the good stuff first, as Dynasty makes the odd move of opening Fallon’s episode with some arbitrary bullshit about Fallon Unlimited leaked employee reviews making her out to be a bad boss, and how this turns off some fashion designer Fallon had wanted to impress so she would design her wedding dress. Girl, that is some shit-tier soap opera crap if I ever heard it. Luckily, things pick back up when Fallon decides to try to ingratiate herself to the designer by appearing on said designer’s best friend’s fashion podcast, and Alexis crashes the taping and diverts all attention to herself. Things escalate when Liam, grudgingly meeting with Laura, mentions it, and Laura’s offer to help Fallon leads to conflict between Fallon and Liam (much to Laura’s delight). The drama crescendos at Culhane’s birthday pyjama party at Club Colby as, with Blake having sown the seeds of love triangle doubt to Liam about Fallon’s unresolved feelings for Culhane (on Laura’s orders), Liam thinks Fallon is trying to run back to her former fiancee. They fight, leading Laura to think the wedding will be delayed. But get your gag ready: it turns out Blake actually defected from Laura’s bullshit almost immediately, and everyone, even Culhane, worked together to put on a show for her. Liam and Fallon are still strong, and Laura congratulates Blake on a job supposedly well done. By hooking up with him. Work, bitch. Meanwhile, it’s Culhane’s birthday, and he agrees to the party being part of House of Devereaux with the intention of leveraging the media attention for some Atlantix announcement (I think?). Things don’t go to plan as Dominique interrupts the party with some good news about Vanessa’s single’s chart performance, but he’s happy for his newly reignited flame. But uh oh, Alan Dale shows him a conversation he recorded of Dominique and Vanessa patting themselves on the back for duping the hell out of Culhane. Sad face. Meanwhile, Cristal becomes awkward working with Flirty Chaplain Wil Traval. Adam also inserts himself obliviously into this subplot to soak up some screentime, but things do end up paying off when Wil Traval and Cristal mack on each other, and Adam is there to witness it to close out the episode (Jeff is also apparently fine post-transplant, if you were wondering. Offscreen). And over in poor, discarded minor character land, Kirby is offput when Sam hires Ramy to be her employee. She later learns from Culhane what really happened with the watch at the Atlantix party last episode. Sam finds out that Ramy has this episode stolen from the hotel office safe, so Sam eventually tries to apologise to Kirby. But in a rare moment of not resetting to the status quo, Kirby tells him to get fucked, as he only decided to trust her concerns about Ramy now that something happened.
But beware, Kirby: get fucked not, lest ye get fucked.
All in all, another solid Dynasty. The jush engines still aren’t totally fired up, but god I do love a good surprise caper.
Also, what timing to have an episode where one of the jokes is about how all the manor staff are out with a mystery flu.
Why I hate this episode:
Google has been unkind, but from what I gather production got halted as of Episode 20? I’m not sure I’ll be able to survive the incompleteness.
Cristal’s subplot, even involving an extramarital affair with a holy man, is still a chore to get through. I really can’t fathom why they bothered hiring Daniella Alonso only to make her iteration of Cristal so fucking dull.
Does anyone actually care about Kirby and Sam’s friendship?
Likewise, are there any die hard Culhane/Vanessa stans out there? Really? Let’s get Monica back in here. Omg, now imagine a Culhane/Monica/Kirby love triangle. That’d be hot.
Oh, and I think I’ve figured out one of the major problems with Elaine Hendrix’s Alexis: she has bad hair. Nicolette always had stunning hair. Don’t do Elaine dirty like this, Dynasty.
But it’s not all bad:
Elaine’s Alexis has a more believable inner goodness, I think owing to her less stilted portrayal. And although that may be a hindrance when it comes to any kind of grand schemes, it’s certainly an asset when you’ve got episodes like this one where Alexis and Fallon have a genuine, unqualified mother-daughter moment. Alexis’ unreserved kind words for Fallon when she calls into the podcast “anonymously” were really beautiful.
She’s not a total softie, though. Her obstructive self-aggrandizing when taking over the earlier podcast from Fallon was pure Alexis, and I couldn’t have been happier to see it.
Now, onto the gag of the episode when it’s revealed that the fight between Fallon and Liam at the pyjama party was all an act. Bitch, I did not anticipate that! That’s two episodes in a row where Liam has come out with a little “I was in on it” reveal that had me totally surprised. And major points for Blake also going two for two with helping Fallon do some successful scheming. The Carringtons do such good work when they team up.
Also teaming up are Blake and Laura’s mouth parts, as they close their run of the episode by making the fuck out. There’s a weird bit of exposition when Laura reveals that the delay of the wedding actually wasn’t necessary after all (she had some plan to delay the wedding because she wanted to make some kind of oil company deal that Liam, once inheriting his Van Kirk Industries shares upon getting married, would likely want to veto) which makes me think her game with Blake might also have some hidden teeth. But feisty, crazy-eyed Laura is a much hotter love interest for Blake than poor, tepid Cristal.
Not that Cristal’s kiss with Wil Traval isn’t requisitely salacious. It was just a shame that the subplot around it is so inconsequential.
Adam does inject some life into it, though, as he unknowingly butts into their flirtation game. Wil Traval also tries preaching to Blake that he should forgive his son. Extra points when Blake is like “nah cunt.” It’s what Adam deserves.
Dominique doesn’t actually get a lot to do this episode apart from continuing her “let’s trick Culhane” schtick. But I will give her the best line of the episode, gifted to her by Culhane, when she picks up something he says as a possible new tagline for herself: “Dominique brings the scandal.” I’m counting on it, sis.
Cristal wears another fitted, nude-coloured outfit this episode. I’m telling you, raiding OG Cristal’s closet is the best thing they’ve done for Cristal all season.
Oh, and Blake says he decided to double cross Laura when he and Liam were out playing golf at the start of the episode. Bitch, looking into those eyes would have convinced me, too.