Dynasty Season 3 Episode 8 – TV Review

Don’t do it, CW! Dare to defy!

Did you really think Dynasty could get everyone into a courtroom and then resist trotting out the Alexis reveal?

And I’m so glad for their lack of willpower. Because it is camp, bitch.

Still kinda waiting for Nathalie Kelley to jump out of a box, though. That would be the gag of the entire series.

TL;DR Blake’s trial gets off to a rocky start thanks to a suddenly scrupulous Fallon; Alan Dale comes in clutch with the assist, though; Dominique’s attention seeking reaches silly new heights; Adam regains his vision, but loses his Nadia love; Fallon isn’t all scruples, though, as she selfishly sabotages her magazine; but then attempts to make up for it and now Liam might die (again!?); Monica leaves town with Vanessa; but Jeff is staying with his new wife… Alexis.

Carrington. Colby.

So let’s get to this murder trial. Things start off rough for Blake, as Culhane gleefully takes the stand to remind everyone Blake killed his dad, and Fallon is up next trying not to perjure herself. Blake is forced to rake her over the coals in cross examination; gavels are thrown; feelings are hurt. What you’d expect from a Carrington court case, really. Meanwhile, Fallon is unimpressed that Liam, covering the trial for Fallon Unlimited, is writing about her unflattering moments, so she gets the bright idea to sabotage the servers and destroy all his work. Meanwhile, she’s also gearing up for Nadia’s final payday to break Adam’s heart. Cristal overhears and insists on joining in on the fun, and they do a very believable job of it. Poor Adam. You’d think he’d be happy to have gotten his sight back, but he instead sets that sight on burning down the vineyard in sorrow. After Blake compliments Fallon on her server sabotage ruthlessness, she decides she wants to be a better person than her dad, and rushes to apologise to Adam. It’s a shame, then, that they squabble, and a smashed pot brings back Liam’s memories of when Adam almost killed him, and then they end up grappling and teetering on the ledge of a second floor barn window above the fiery blaze below. You know, a normal weekday. Meanwhile, whiffs of a surprise witness are picked up by Blake, and Alan Dale finds out Kirby’s been chatting to the FBI and suspects it’s her. Blake strikes out on his own to tell her to fuck off back to Australia, but it turns out the FBI had been asking some comparatively innocuous taxation questions to her new beau. So she instead fucks off with him. Meanwhile, Sam’s new love interest has ghosted him. Meanwhile, Monica rages at Dominique over the truth about Vanessa. But she realises it’s not Vanessa’s fault, and ends up taking her along to New York to open a new Club Colby location. Meanwhile, Dominique decides a new way to get attention is to act melodramatically in the courtroom (and it works!). Oh, and Jeff is back in town with more pressing things on his mind than Dominique (or that incurable disease he keeps ignoring). Like the fact that he’s married Alexis and she was the surprise witness after all! Gasp!

Black and white power suit and all. Not quite as nice as Nicolette’s billowy sleeves, though.

So I can see now why Dynasty didn’t go too hard on the drama for the Thanksgiving episode. They were saving things for this one.

And you know what? I’ll take it. Sometimes you just can’t fit vineyard arson and plastic surgery recasting reveals into holiday-themed episodes. That’s life.

 

Why I hate this episode:

But as much as I jushed over the Alexis reveal, there was something about the presentation that was a little underwhelming. The cinematography or the music were just a little lacklustre. Especially after the ominous slo-mo and latin chanting that came when she first arrived (and I came) back in Season 1. Maybe a couple of dutch angles might have helped?

Poor Kirby comes back for five seconds, and then ships out again. Maybe she’ll work better as a fly-in-fly-out supporting character (like Monica), because it’s clear that Dynasty has no idea what to do with her this season.

Same goes for Cristal, still struggling to find any meaningful things to do or unatrocious things to wear. What the fuck even was that big pink headband?

If Vanessa’s gone, what will be Dominique’s motivation now?

Oh, and Fallon’s sabotage of the Fallon Unlimited servers was a little melodramatic. The magazine itself is yet to convince me that it’s anything more than an arbitrary plot device to keep her busy.

 

But it’s not all bad:

I only just realised its acronym is “FU.” Nice one, Dynasty.

I also didn’t mind her little face masked costume she wore while doing it. “Corporate espionage, but make it fashion.”

Fallon’s little subplot of realising she’s too much like Blake is hardly groundbreaking, but it gave her a solid beginning, middle, and end to the episode. With the end then being quickly undone when she realises Adam is lying about still being blind. And then Liam getting into mortal danger.

Yes, my loves, our blessed BAWG King Liam could be headed for death again (so soon!?). Fallon throws a pot at Adam to test his vision, and when it breaks it triggers Liam’s memory of Adam smashing the pot plant over his head in the Season 2 finale. He rage-pounces on Adam, but this is a poor choice, as they end up on a flimsy ledge, high over the burning vineyard below. I feel like Adam hasn’t done enough with his time on the show to get written off yet, but as I whinged about last episode, Liam’s story feels like it’s going in circles. So he could be getting the chop. Good God, I hope not.

Liam and Fallon have emotional outbursts in common, though, as Fallon demonstrates during her court appearance. Her tantrum and gavel-throw are absolutely on-brand. Always more of Fallon being a good few Os and Ts beyond OTT, please.

Her team-up with Nadia comes to a swift end this episode as she enacts the final phase of the scheme and Nadia has to break Adam’s heart. Luckily, Cristal happens to catch them mid-transaction, and inserts herself into their little game. With their powers combined, they set up a ruse to trick Adam into thinking Nadia was boinking Blake (Fallon has a speaker box with Blake’s voice recorded and everything), which he completely falls for. It’s bliss.

Blake himself has a pretty impressive episode. Not one to get down by being on trial for murder, he is however thoroughly unimpressed when he thinks Kirby is the sneaky snake hiding in their ranks. Kirby gets the best line of the episode when Blake confronts her at the hotel bar:
Blake: “You and I need to talk.”
Kirby: “About what? Have we ever talked before?”
Kirby knows what’s up, writers.

To try to find the mole, Blake has Alan Dale interrogate the staff, which includes some delectable cameos from Mrs Gunnerson and the evergreen White Driver.

Kirby, naturally, isn’t the surprise witness, and I was a little sad to see she shuffled off to go back out of Atlanta with her boyfriend so soon. But hey, at least she got to wear this rad collared shirt look. And she and Sam got to talk about how his new love interest has vanished, which makes me happy. He was pretty rubbish.

Sam gets basically nothing to do this episode, but Dominique does involve him in a stupid fun sequence where she tricks him into thinking Beyonce wants to come to La Mirage so he’ll have to leave the courthouse, and she can take his place. Because Dominique isn’t able to get in otherwise.

She earns the second best line of the episode (mainly due to the delivery) when she tries to get in on her own at first: “Show me to my seat. Dominique Devereaux: sister of the accused.” This is followed up brilliantly by her trying to get Cristal to vouch for her, and Cristal claims she doesn’t know her. Love me some petty female rivalry.

Dominique makes her time in the courtroom count by melodramatically going off on the prosecutor. This drums up some serious tabloid attention, and she next comes to court with a cameraman alongside her. Whatever happened to that cute reporter guy?

Interestingly, Dominique’s reaction to Alexis’ reveal is kind of sad and scared. I wonder what their history is like?

I have to imagine that Jeff and Alexis’ marriage is just for business, or has something to do with his illness, right? If he could resist Season 1 Alexis in all her Mrs Robinson glory, then there’s no way I’ll believe he’s fallen for this knock-off new version.

Alan Dale is justifiably aghast at Blake’s harassment of Kirby. But way to abuse the immunity offered by the prosecutor to then get on the stand and claim he himself killed Mac the security guy. Smart.

Oh, and with Dynasty now on holiday until mid-January, I’m going to have all this time to myself to worry about losing Liam. Hey, it’ll fill up the emptiness that is my life. I’m grateful.

Don’t joke about that.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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