Riverdale Season 4 Episode 6 – TV Review

If I wanted something dark and boring, CW, I’d go back to my actual life. Duh.

The non-Betty subplots of this episode are so appallingly bad that I won’t even vaguely reference them this time.

It’s unfathomable to me how anyone who was involved in the production of the stellar first season of Riverdale could look at what it’s become and say they’re proud of it.

All hope is lost. The second Betty’s storyline hits a bump the road, I’m abandoning ship, y’all.

TL;DR Betty digs deeper into Charles’ backstory, getting some handy deets from an imprisoned Chic; a polygraph test reveals Charles is a recovering drug addict or something; Charles ingratiates himself to Betty, Alice, and Skeet by helping obfuscate the evidence of that guy Chic killed; but oops, Charles and Chic are actually secret lovers and are in kahootz.

I know it isn’t incest. But it kind of feels like incest.

So it’s still The Betty-only Report around here, and things get a little bit spicy this episode. Determined to prove Charles is a serial killer, Betty is her usual snooping self, and knocks things up a notch by going to see Chic in prison. Chic regales her with a tale of how he and Charles were indeed lovers (Kevin was right!), and then Charles killed a guy one time. When confronted, Charles spins things in the other direction by instead claiming Chic killed that guy. It doesn’t really matter (what’s a little murder in Riverdale these days, anyway?), but Betty’s visit to Chic does spur Chic into starting to blab to the FBI about the buried body of that guy he killed in Season 2. Except he’s claiming Alice did the bludgeoning. Skeet and Alice get poopy pants mad at Betty, but luckily Charles is able to help them intercept law enforcement, and keep things under control for now. Betty also finds out during a polygraph test she forces on Charles that he is a recovering drug addict, and not a serial killer. Oof. Betty ends up doing the right thing and proclaims her trust in Charles now that he’s proven himself to her, but things take a silly turn at the end of the episode with the reveal that Charles and Chic were in this together all along, in a bid to dupe Betty and his parents.

The gay lovers thing is real, though. So that’s nice.

I was very, very close to giving up on Riverdale this week. Again, the other subplots are a horrid, despicable joke. But it’s a testament to whoever is ensuring Betty doesn’t get swept away in that flood of garbage that I’m still here.

Even when she’s dredging up long-gone, eye rollingly crappy stuff from seasons past, I still care. Because it’s Betty.

 

Why I hate this episode:

But did you have to bring Chic back? Gosh.

Oh, and I’m also sick of that guy Chic killed (the “shady man”) coming back up over and over again. Sure, it’s nice that Riverdale isn’t forgetting about the Coopers burying a body. But it’s been done, guys. Once The Farm plays a plot card, surely that should have been the point when it was no longer cool, right?

 

But it’s not all bad:

Still, points for continuity. It’s not often that Riverdale scores those.

I admire Betty’s doggedness in going after Charles. Betty always plays to get shit done. And done shit gets.

I lied earlier about not bringing up the other subplots, as I have to give this episode’s best line to Veronica when she speaks the same incredulity we’re all feeling over Hermione’s decision to shack back up with Hiram: “I can’t believe you. We were done with him!” It’s a communal pain.

Oh, but maybe Hermione’s judgement could be a little bit clouded.

“If I’m not going to be a compelling, believable, worth-emotionally-investing-in character, I might as well be maggoted.”

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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  1. Dynasty Season 3 Episode 6 – TV Review | I Just Hate Everything - November 17, 2019

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