Nancy Drew Season 1 Episode 5 – TV Review

Omg, could you imagine?

I had the same itch with Nancy Drew that I had with Riverdale this week, and very nearly tossed it in the Discontinued bin where it belongs.

But like Riverdale, I’m going to give Miss Drew one more shot.

Because ghost possession in this universe is wacky and apparently easily-accepted by the characters, which was a pleasant surprise to me.

TL;DR George is hella possessed by Tiffany, who is out for revenge on Ryan; the gang scrambles to do something before George’s spirit is devoured; except Nancy, who would prefer to risk George’s life so she can ask Tiffany who killed her; things end up okay; Nancy finds out about some shady business deal between Ryan and a new hot, rich guy on the scene; Ryan knew Lucy Sable in high school; Bland Boyfriend and Tiffany’s sister make a deal to find out what’s on that USB.

Who cares, tho?

So let’s firstly hand it to the characters of Nancy Drew, who are all very chill about George being literally possessed by a ghost. Especially City Girl. Brava. The episode mainly revolves around this, as Tiffany occasionally takes over George, and George’s mum (welcome back, Liza!) cautions the gang that if they don’t get Tiffany out, then she will eat George’s chi/soul and George will be gone forever. Everyone agrees they need to exorcise that bitch. Well, except for Nancy, who instead wants to ride the edge of the time limit as hard as she can, because the closer to eating George Tiffany gets, the more she’ll remember. And if Nancy can just ask Tiffany straight-up who killed her, then who needs to do any fucking detective work, right? Meanwhile, some hunky guy from the local country club asks the diner to last-minute cater a gala in Tiffany’s honour, which they agree to. Cue Tiffany possessing George and stalking Ryan at the event. The gang intervenes in time, with Tiffany’s sister momentarily appearing to almost derail things, but George ends up okay, and Tiffany accepts her death and moves on. Poor Nancy rues the fact that she didn’t get an answer for the killer question, but resolves to dig up a time capsule at the high school, and the hunky country club guy turns out to be a rich guy who helps Nancy do this. Bland Boyfriend better watch his bland back. Within, Nancy finds video messages that show Lucy Sable and Ryan knew each other in high school. Wow? Meanwhile, Bland Boyfriend hits up Tiffany’s sister to get that USB back, and it turns out she couldn’t use it, anyway, because it merely links to a website that’s password protected. Stoner Guy helps them broker a peace deal, and once Bland Boyfriend correctly guesses the password, they find files showing Hunkish Guy and Ryan had some kind of business deal. Meanwhile, Katie Findlay returns to flirt with City Girl. And Nancy’s dad isn’t in this episode.

Which explains why Nancy turned her cunt-o-vision over to George.

So all in all, kind of a fun episode of Nancy Drew. The tone still needs a lot of refining, and the characters need to be actual characters (as opposed to CW mid-season filler show cardboard cutouts), but the reason why I’m sticking with this show for one more episode is that we now have the slightest semblance of promise.

Tiffany’s ghost is gone, so now it’s time to get into the actual investigation and see what’s up, baby.

This is a Nancy Drew show, right?

 

Why I hate this episode:

You know who wouldn’t agree? Nancy fucking Drew, who is willing to put George’s life at risk in order to solve the murder mystery with the least amount of detective work. I’ve had it with this bitch. Officially. Go home, and let somebody else be the protagonist. You’re a mess, girl.

Tiffany’s motivation could probably be explained away by the fact she’s a ghost, but it would have been nice if her only purpose in the episode wasn’t “must punish unfaithful husband.” Isn’t there anything else in your life that mattered to you? Does it have to be all about where your husband, who I’m gathering you didn’t even like that much, stuck his penis?

While I approve of the introduction of Hunkish Guy as another love interest for Nancy, do we really need this show to have real estate deal intrigue? It never did anything good for Gossip Girl. You can’t afford to kneecap yourself with that kind of thing this early, Nancy Drew.

Was there a line of dialogue to explain why Bland Boyfriend helped the diner crew with the catering job. He’s a mechanic, right? Who doesn’t work for the diner?

Oh, and Nancy’s decision to dig up the time capsule is prompted by a conclusion jump she makes after seeing that the photo of Karen and Lucy she accidentally found last episode just so happens to be from when the time capsule was buried. The prodigious detective work continues! Also, big fucking whoop that two people of the same age that went to the same high school, gasp, were acquaintances! Yep, Ryan definitely has something to do with Lucy’s death. One hundred percent. No doubt.

 

But it’s not all bad:

Lucy’s murder mystery might at least involve flashbacks with early 2000s fashion, so for that reason alone it’s already more compelling than Tiffany’s murder mystery.

Speaking of blasts from the past, holla at the Candlewick Inn showing up as the location for the garden party. In this age of reboots, will we ever get more Harper’s Island? One can dream.

This is also where it’s revealed that Hunkish Guy isn’t the blue collar worker he appeared to be, but is in fact a rich person with past business dealings (and present tension) with Ryan. With Bland Boyfriend too busy pining over Tiffany, maybe it’s time Nancy did move on to richer pastures?

The gala is a fabulous setting for Tiffany to take control of George and stalk around with a knife while wearing a blood-red dress. This is the kind of camp I came for, sis.

Glad to see more Liza Lapira.

Props to City Girl this episode, who really takes the lead on helping George with her possession. Whenever Nancy is a crap protagonist, it’s good to know a more capable female lead is willing to step in. Setting a date with a returning Katie Findlay (I knew it!) also doesn’t hurt.

Tiffany’s sister continues to prove herself an enjoyable, if mild, presence. Tiffany’s final wish before being exorcised is for Bland Boyfriend to protect her sister, so here’s hoping he does.

Karen tells Nancy that she and Lucy Sable were best friends in high school, but had a falling out. Here’s hoping that it’s due to anything other than a rape. Come on, CW. I believe you can be better than that.

Oh, and on that note, let’s hope George can find something more to do now that her guilt over being the other woman has been dealt with.

Oh, honey. It’s because you’re not white.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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