Dynasty Season 2 Episode 18 – TV Review

Liam can do whatever he wants to me if he’s gonna be looking like that. Fuckin’ hell.

I can’t remember the last time I was this invested in a heterosexual romance. Because damn, Liam and Fallon are so compelling.

Oh, and Alexis’ face is revealed and it’s shocking and horrifying. Alexis is going to need to learn that she’ll pale next to Liam.

TL;DR Fallon finally tells Liam exactly how she feels, and they kiss; this might be bad news for his book sales, though; Jeff and Black Driver try to nail Blake down for money laundering; Blake fights with, but then works with, Cristal’s dad; Sam throws some inconsequential “I’m divorced, now” party; but at least here is where Alexis debuts her new face.

Fallon is not pleased.

So the meat of the episode is, thankfully, Fallon and Liam-centric, as it turns out his book may not have been about her, but about Liam’s ex-girlfriend Ashley (you remember her, right?). Fallon is trying to play things cool and summons Ashley to do some press with Liam to promote the book, but seethes from the sidelines as it looks like they might get back together. But character growth does occur, and at Sam’s masquerade party, Fallon comes clean to Liam about being in love with him, and he says me, too. Meanwhile, Adam is keeping the newly-faced Alexis away from everyone in anticipation of revealing her dramatically at the party. When this goes down, everyone is appropriately aghast at the Fallon-faced madness of it all. Liam encourages Fallon to try and go work things out with Alexis later, but the emotions are still too raw. Oh, and Adam shops around a photo he took of Liam and Fallon kissing at the party, I assume to tabloid magazines. Meanwhile, Sam throws a masquerade party to celebrate his new single status, as his divorce from Steven has been finalised. It’s largely pointless. Meanwhile, Blake becomes paranoid about further attacks from Cristal’s dad, leading to her admitting the knocking out of the bodyguard last episode was her doing. Blake is undeterred, though, and when he calls in a power outage on a big soccer match in Mexico being run by her family, Cristal is forced to call Papa in to see Blake to make them agree to a ceasefire. They do, but then it’s revealed secretly that Blake and Papa are already in business together with gambling or something. Oh, and this likely has to do with the missing millions from the Atlantix, which Jeff and Black Driver are still out to expose. Jeff is acting erratically (as a result of that poison Adam put in his new office paint, which I forgot to mention last episode), and hastily goes to the FBI. Black Driver is still in their crosshairs after all that BBB shit, so is not amused.

Neither am I. Don’t remind me about that stinker of a subplot (the only true black eye on this glorious season).

Despite having a goddamn masquerade party (remember the one from Gossip Girl? So good), this episode is pretty low energy. But that isn’t to say that it’s a bad episode of Dynasty. It just feels little safe, and feels a little in-between bombshells.

I’m sure things will escalate again soon.

 

Why I hate this episode:

The tag out of the episode with Adam shopping around the Fallon/Liam kiss photo is not the right choice. I suspect he’s trying to ruin book sales by exposing the lie of the Liam/Ashley press relationship, but, like, who cares? Liam and Fallon didn’t do anything to hide their middle-of-the-dancefloor face mash from the entire party (masks off, might I add). I don’t think they’re that worried about it, Adam. You’ll need to do better than that if you want to be a Dynasty villain.

As horrified as our characters were over Alexis’ face reveal, I was kind of hoping that there would be some mistaken identity shenanigans. Especially considering it happened at a fucking masquerade party. Missed opportunity there, Dynasty.

Did Alexis also get a lobotomy while she was getting her face done? Because she’s acting like this little timid puppy around Adam, seeking his permission and shit. Cunt, he pushed your face into a fire! Also, how the fuck did Alexis not notice from looking in the mirror that her face looks exactly like Fallon’s? What have you done to Alexis, Dynasty?

If Blake and Papa are already in business together, why did Blake fuck up his soccer match with that power outage?

Also, Papa is not some hot yummy beefy daddy like I was hoping. He’s just an ordinary looking older handsome dude. And I was completely convinced that Blake letting him use his private jet would lead to some kind of sabotage plane crash, but nah. Another missed opportunity. Unless they’re saving that for next episode?

Why is Sam still here, show? Honestly?

Oh, and Adam tries to slow dance with Fallon while masked at the party. It ends very quickly, and Fallon expresses disgust about his incestuous insinuations, but we don’t need this, Dynasty. Cut it out.

 

But it’s not all bad:

Or fully commit to it. Hard. Like, uncomfortably hard. If you’re going to do it, then make Adam full on sister-lusting crazy pants. Don’t play the incest card and then half ass it.

On the subject of people wanting Fallon, I want Fallon. To have all the screentime in the world, because I am utterly here for her romance with Liam. Watching her casually Irish up a coffee while seething over a Liam/Ashley interview is the cartoon character realness I’ve come to expect from her. More, always.

The fact that she actually spits it out and declares her feelings for Liam also puts any uncertainty to rest over his feelings for her, too. Let’s get this love fest started, baby. With soap operatic hurdles and complications ahead, of course.

Ashley doesn’t get a lot to do, and is literally handwaved away to leave the episode, but I appreciate that Dynasty put in the effort to get her back. It also turns out that she’s some New York “it” girl, and a childhood sweetheart of Liam’s. So I wouldn’t count her out just yet. I kinda wish she had been named “Selena” or something, though. Can you imagine?

Fallon’s dress for the masquerade party is an interesting parallel to Alexis’ fashion when she appeared last season, with this black and white number with big, puffy 80s sleeves. I reckon this would be intentional to further mirror her parallels to Alexis, who literally mirrors Fallon these days.

Cristal doesn’t achieve much this episode, but her party dress is this top-to-bottom rainbow sequined extravaganza with huge cleavage, and this gorgeous half mask. Snaps for Cristal, baby. Werk.

I’m glad the divorce is final, so Sam can now find a new love interest. And make it quick.

Jeff is a sweaty, antsy mess after being exposed to whatever nasty shit Adam put into his office’s paint. Maybe it’ll kill him off, and Dynasty will finally dump that dead weight?

Fallon gets the best line of the episode after Liam advises her to remember that Alexis may have a hideous Fallon mask on the outside, but she’s still the same on the inside: “But Alexis isn’t even that great on the inside.” I’m sure Adam would be happy to test that to find out.

Liam is devastatingly handsome at the masquerade party. Fucking. Sploosh.

Oh, and I know it’s getting a little uncomfortable how hot I am for Liam, but come on, you guys. You can’t deny it.

Could I just have Liam, though?

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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