Ciao, 2018 – Blog

I’d actually forgotten that I usually post one of these on New Year’s Eve.

So it’s gon’ be a rushed disappointment.

If only we could say the same about 2018, because goddamn, did it feel long.

What I won’t miss about 2018:

Fuck. You. Riverdale. After all the praise I heaped on you in last year’s NYE post, and you’ve turned into this oppressive, dark drudgery. Get it back the fuck together soon. Please.

The CW has more blood on its hands this year, though, as not only did it horrendously fumble The Originals‘ final season, but it somehow sunk lower with the pathetic Legacies. What the hell, CW? Did you forget how to make a TVD-verse show?

20gayteen may have been lucky for some (see Dynasty below), but it wasn’t a guaranteed LGBT hit. Remember how bland and ineffectual Love, Simon was? Remember Love, Simon at all?

Every subsequent rewatch of Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom has left me less impressed. Although, I suppose that’s my fault for watching Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom more than once.

Why couldn’t Neve Campbell have been the lead of Skyscraper?

Oh, and the Charmed reboot was, like, fine.

 

But it wasn’t all bad, so I’ll miss:

The fact that the Charmed reboot was anything other than a complete disaster is really the best we could have hoped for. And that it managed to be fun and silly in a world full of TV bleakness is truly special.

On that same note, the fact that Heathers managed to be simultaneously way too aggressively political, yet utterly devoid of having anything meaningful to say, was true art.

Riverdale may have fallen off a cliff, but we’ll always have the Carrie episode. A genuine moment in time.

All hail Dynasty, the gayest thing in 20gayteen. Can you say “Thanksgiving special episode with Wizard of Oz hallucination fantasy featuring a same sex kiss?”

Mission Impossible: Fallout may not have had a story, but good God, there is no better action anywhere.

Not even in Aquaman, which is itself near-Wonder Woman levels of fabulosity. DC/Warner Bros better not let James Wan go.

Avengers: Infinity War was pretty great.

Oh, and the Angelina redemption arc on Jersey Shore: Family Vacation is what kept me going this year. They say magic isn’t real, but after this, I beg to differ.

 

So that was your truncated (you’re welcome) 2018. As long as this next year doesn’t start off with Logan Paul giggling at a dead body in a vlog, I think all things can only get better from here.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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