Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 6 – TV Review

PLL Wanted Dead or Alive Mary crowbar

I don’t see the Liars swingin’ crowbars. Get proactive, girls.

At this point, the flashbacks and Dilaurentis family past are too much to keep up with. I was sitting there during Jenna’s exposition dump and I honestly was putting in as much effort as possible to keep up. But I can’t, anymore.

If I get something wrong, please feel free to chew me out in the comments. It’s the only way I’ll learn. Because the show isn’t doing anything to help me in that department.

TL;DR Jenna was friends with Cece and Doctor Dude or something; Alison whinges and moans a lot about Cece (still!?); the AD mask parade continues; Aria belatedly accepts Ezra’s proposal; Spencer and Hanna make peace; Sara dies.

Where’s Sara? Dead, baby.

So here’s the Liar-by-Liar:

Alison is still out in front, as she bitches at the Liars for throwing her under the bus for Cece’s murder, but then quickly forgives. Just in time to learn that Cece only ever built a relationship with her to get out of psychiatric care. And then AD tries to strangle her to death. So Alison’s having a ball.

Emily is the one who learns about Cece, from Jenna, of all people. She questions her, and Jenna admits to knowing Doctor Dude, and being the one who got him the doctor job (and his fake identity) so he could be with Cece, whom she befriended out of spite for the Liars and Alison. Emily also makes some kind of peace with a now-skeptical Sara, but then Sara dies, so whatever.

Aria told Ezra that she needed time to think about his proposal. Because she couldn’t marry him without telling him that she and her friends killed Doctor Dude. So she does, and then he proposes again and she excepts. Yay?

Hanna comes clean about dumping Jordan, and she and Spencer hug it out over the whole Caleb thing.

And Spencer manages to make peace with Caleb, too. Which leaves her free to sling her crotch at Marco.

First his best friend, and now his boss? How much embarrassment can Toby abide?

I was pretty on board with this episode for the most part. Even with all the Liars, plus Alison, back in the mix, the lack of focus didn’t bother me as much as other recent episodes. And I think this was largely due to the AD mystery, stupid mask and all, actually gaining some momentum.

But then Jenna stomps on in with her ridiculous flashback, and I gave up.

I just don’t care at this point. Who honestly gives a shit about this Dilaurentis family closet of endless skeletons? I’ll ask it again: what do any of the Liars have to do with this? Let Alison be targeted by A/B/AD/Uber-A/whatever.

The major story arc of the show doesn’t necessitate the Liars’ involvement. That’s a problem.

 

Why I hate this episode:

It’s a problem because we’re spending agonising minutes of screentime with Aria’s proposal woes, when the mystery arc, the foundation of the show, doesn’t have anything to do with her. I’m sick of it, man.

Also, why was Aria so worried about Ezra knowing they’d covered up Hanna’s vehicular manslaughter of Doctor Dude? Doesn’t he already know that Aria clobbered ol’ Shana to death? And he’s already fine with that. Doctor Dude wasn’t even Aria’s fault this time. Who cares?

“Who cares?” PLL should use that for their tagline.

And she does eventually accept the proposal. So brace yourself for their wedding episode. I’m sure there won’t be any soap operatics during that special day at all. Maybe another evil twin reveal?

Hanna leads a charge for believing that Doctor Dude is actually alive, because she gets a call on his burner phone that sounds like him. Bitch, it’s Wren. Come on. She and Spencer end the episode by going to dig up his undisturbed grave to discover that yes, he’s still dead and rotting down there. Duh. Then the stinger shows AD recorded footage of them digging up the body. Because obviously they did, you dumbasses. Haven’t you figured this out yet?

Oh, and Ashley is again mentioned, and again not shown.

 

But it’s not all bad:

I’d like to believe that she and Jason are off living happily ever after somewhere. At least until they both get hauled back in for their obligatory appearances.

The most effective element of the episode is the increased attention paid to the AD mystery. Marco informs Alison, Mary, and a tagging-along Spencer, that the police currently suspect that the train ticket stuff was indeed a ruse to lead them into believing Doctor Dude had gone away. So it sounds like the Liars’ game is up. However, Marco continues on to claim that he thinks Doctor Dude made this false lead himself so he could operate around Rosewood undetected. I lol’d.

And AD evidently is doing just that, as they’re able to impersonate a police officer and get into Alison’s house. She rips off a bit of the mask during their tussle, and that evidence (for fucking once) does make it to the police. So the police now know to be on the lookout for masks and stuff. Good.

The Jenna flashback is a big, confusing ball of “huh,” but it does have one positive effect: destroying Alison’s faith in Cece. Alison now sees that she was only ever a tool for Cece to use to get out of the psychiatric care facility. She already had friends, like Jenna. She didn’t need Alison’s companionship. She only needed a family member to live with. Cece never fails to disappoint.

There’s also a little moment where Alison thinks she’s got Mary on the ropes regarding her “I’m mostly innocent” story. Alison refutes Mary’s claim that she never met Cece, because why else would Cece take on Mary’s last name, Drake, if they’d never met? Mary is shocked and comforted to hear her daughter took on her name, and very sensibly suggests either she found out, or maybe Jessica told her. Score one for Mary; strike twelve thousand for Alison.

I’m relieved that Spencer and Hanna have buried the Caleb hatchet. We didn’t need any more of that. Spencer and Caleb, too, leave things amicably.

I’m glad Sara’s dead.

Mary almost attacks Spencer with a crowbar because she’s paranoid about Doctor Dude coming after her. So close.

I do welcome the prospect of an Aria/Ezra wedding for one reason: it will be spectacularly ruined. Hell, maybe Ezra will even die? That’d be hot.

Oh, and that’s if Ezra’s not wooed by another pretty brunette, first.

PLL Wanted Dead or Alive Ezra Caleb bar

Dating multiple PLL characters is enough to turn any man.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

4 responses to “Pretty Little Liars Season 7 Episode 6 – TV Review”

  1. That one person... says :

    “Hell, maybe Ezra would even die? That’d be hot.”
    Lol, you should write for this show.
    At least this is the last season. Then it can burn in the back of your mind like Glee did.
    Speaking of last season, maybe all the liars secrets would finally be fully exposed. But then, knowing the competency of these cops…

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