Containment Episode 4 – TV Review

Containment With Silence and Tears Chris Wood glasses

And some mandated shirtless time per episode.

We’re lucky Chris Wood’s pretty face is around this episode, because Claudia Black doesn’t appear at all.

Chris Wood’s hotness and Claudia Black’s wigs are the only things keeping me going.

Well, Lex, I suppose. But not after this episode.

TL;DR Lex gets nagged at for not being brave enough to break into the cordon and reunite with Jana; and he fucking listens to it; Chris continues his flirtation with Teacher, but British Doctor seems to be trying to form a love triangle; El Prego’s boyfriend gets inside the cordon; Jana uses her 1337 haxorz skillz to make a semi-working phone.

With which she unnecessarily calls Lex. Obviously.

Lex gets himself a high quantity of screentime this episode, and it proves to be his downfall. He has to wrangle El Prego’s boyfriend, Xander, who is utterly determined to break into the cordon. And he’s got Blogger bitching down his neck for being a government shill. Blogger eventually teams up with Xander, and our little baby daddy gets inside the cordon. Lex feels like a dirtbag for not doing the same, for some reason. Yeah, there’s a highly communicable, 100% kill rate, fast-acting super virus in there, but it’ll all be worth it if I can hang out with my girlfriend? Meanwhile, Teacher goes to British Doctor needing some medication for an unspecified ailment. Chris Wood cottons on and offers to loot a pharmacy for British Doctor, getting Teacher’s pills and some ingredients for the potential vaccine. The vaccine tests, even with the supplies, fail. But Teacher and Chris grow closer together, with British Doctor peering from the wings. Meanwhile, El Prego’s mum’s store is again raided by bandits, but a second group of bandits thwarts them and then (I think?) commandeers the store. And Jana makes nice with all of her coworkers again, but she brings out the You Shall Not Pass stick when a maintenance worker holed out on the roof requests to be let into the office. She also makes a phone to call Lex. The call drops out, so she misses her chance to berate him some more.

But that’s all she lives for.

Containment is yet to have that standout moment to announce that it’s here and means business.

What it has, instead, is insufferable soap operatics. Not unlike many other CW shows.

But when your soap operatics are ignoring the guaranteed death virus that your characters could contract at any moment, that’s a soap sud too far.


Why I hate this episode:

I vehemently disagree with this idea that Lex is an arsehole for being outside the cordon and doing his job. Xander is portrayed as foolish, but still brave for wanting to be with El Prego. But what good will Lex’s hypothetical break-in to see Jana do? If he wanted to go inside so he could do police stuff then I’d get it. But no, he wants to be by Jana’s side. So, what, they can both die together?

What does Jana expect Lex to tell her when she tries to call him? Obviously the news isn’t going to be very uplifting if Claudia’s cut off all communications inside the cordon. Does she think he’s gonna be all “Oh, yeah. The virus is fine. It actually makes you spew sunshine and rainbows and buy only winning lottery tickets.” No, bitch. It’s bad. You’re stuck, but whingeing at your boyfriend to come inside to his death isn’t a noble pursuit.

The budding love triangle between Teacher, Chris, and British Doctor is already exhausting.

Blogger helps Xander get inside the cordon in exchange for him sending footage back of the lesbians. You know, to see if they’re okay after contracting the 100% kill everyone every time in a matter of hours virus. They’re not.

Oh, and Jana gets some shoved-in backstory about how her mother put her on a raft to the United States as a child or something. No, thanks.


But it’s not all bad:

For all the shit I give Jana (and you know I do), she’s been an effective leader of her little quarantine kingdom. And I appreciate that she’s not a sentimental idiot, and refuses the maintenance man entry. Lex and Xander are doing enough emotional bullshit as it is.

I suspect the maintenance man will probably be able to break in, though. I don’t think he was too happy when he was told there was no room at the very large, very vacant inn.

There are also some sick people running around in the office building’s car park. So Jana’s group is going to have intruders coming from above, and from below.

Chris Wood hasn’t taken his shirt off yet, but he’s still really pretty. Like, really pretty.

Teacher admits to him that her ailment is some kind of mental imbalance brought on by drug use when she was dating the father of her son. I assume that’s the reason why she hasn’t done the sensible thing and had sex with him yet.

Chris admits to her that he’s a dirty slut because he has intimacy issues. See, Teacher? He’d do it. Virus be damned.

The grocery store situation has me intrigued. I thought maybe Bandit Team 2 were just good samaritan vigilantes trying to help El Prego’s mum out. But they stay. And they stay armed. Cool.

Blogger’s grief over his friends’ deaths made me smile. Like, duh, dude.

Oh, and this Chris Wood Appreciation Hour wouldn’t be complete without another tender moment:

Containment With Silence and Tears Chris Wood love triangle

If all three points on that triangle are Chris Wood, then yes.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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