Arrow Season 4 Episode 16 – TV Review

Arrow Broken Hearts Oliver shot

Follow Damien’s example: shoot Felicity.

You know what would go great the episode immediately following Felicity’s astoundingly selfish dumping of Oliver?

A procession of humiliation wherein Oliver continues to prostrate himself to please her unworthy cunt arse, up to and including recitation of sincere wedding vows, while Felicity acts like the self-righteous brat she is.

Yeah, that’s exactly what Arrow fans have been aching for.

TL;DR At least Felicity ends up rebuffing him, so we’re on the first step on the road to the end of Olicity; Cupid shows up for a re-Villain of the Week case; Laurel struggles during Damien’s arraignment, but Quentin sacrifices himself to successfully bolster her case; flashback Oliver and OSG steal a magical idol from Black Boss.

And it turns out the Cave of Ordeals isn’t so picky about who enters after all.

So yeah, Oliver and Felicity are broken up, so Oliver has to endure her smarmy barbs while they continue to try to work together. Their target this episode is a returned Cupid, who now hates love, but loves murdering celebrity couples. Oliver and Felicity have to stage a wedding to draw her out, and of course Oliver, who has been trying to win Felicity back this whole episode, pledges his love using his wedding vows. Cupid predictably shows up and the Super Friends stop her, but Felicity still doesn’t want Oliver back, and quits the team. Meanwhile, Laurel has trouble getting evidence together to convince a judge to take her case against Damien to trial. Things look bad, but Quentin, against Laurel’s wishes, sacrifices himself by testifying about his collusion with Damien. The gambit is successful, and Damien’s going to trial, baby. And in the flashbacks, Black Boss and his goons follow Oliver and OSG into the Cave of Ordeals. There’s a magic idol or something in there that Black Boss plans to sacrifice all the slaves to, so Oliver and OSG steal it. But they’re still trapped in the cave, and the only way out is through Black Boss.

Will Oliver make it!?

I ask you this: is there anyone out there who still supports Oliver and Felicity as a couple? Their relationship has been slowly drowning this show ever since they went official, but I can understand that some people would have still been on board because it was sho shweet.

But after the inexcusable cuntishness Felicity displayed last week, I refuse to believe that a single person watching Arrow still wants this to happen.

So then why does the show pretend that it wants them to get back together? Are the writers really that out of touch?

 

Why I hate this episode:

Yes, the episode does end with Felicity’s final refusal of Oliver, but the show is clearly still on her side when Felicity is allowed to be a total dick to Oliver all episode with her criticisms and sighs. Holy shit, what is Arrow thinking?

In other WTF logic news, Laurel has a hard time getting testimony against Damien. Diggle testifies about Damien’s very public abduction of him, Thea and Felicity at the Christmas party, but Damien’s lawyer (cleverly, which I’ll get to in the positive section below) tears him apart. Now, there were a buttload of other people at that party who could testify, but the episode handwaves that away with Laurel saying they lied or remained silent when subpoenaed. For fuck’s sake, seriously? Jesus.

Felicity’s insensitivity is truly something to behold. Her chipper attitude while moving out of the loft is one thing, but it’s those little digs at Oliver throughout the episode that really send her over the line.

And to make things even more frustrating, the episode tries to pull her back when she gives an impassioned speech to Cupid about how love isn’t bad blah blah blah. But then nek minnit, she’s rejecting Oliver again. I’m over it. We’ve all been over it for a long time.

The reason Cupid is out in the world again is because Amanda Waller apparently had some arrangement with the Suicide Squad that they could work their way off the team. Which Cupid evidently did. Are you kidding me? Does that sound like Amanda “I put bombs in you mostly for fun” Waller? Even she had told them that was the agreement, there’s no way she would have actually set them loose.

If Star City is such a crime-ravaged shithole, why does it have multiple celebrity couples? Do they come free with the overly abundant tech research companies?

So the Cave of Ordeals is super picky about granting entry, but once it’s chosen one person, then every crazed, homicidal mercenary around can slip right in after them?

Felicity sympathises with Cupid’s war on love.

Oh, and to close out the episode, we see Damien has smuggled a ring in with him to his jail cell. Is that how he uses his magic or something? I don’t remember.

 

But it’s not all bad:

The stuff with Damien’s trial is much more interesting than watching Oliver get walked all over by Cuntlicity in the main plot. I cared more about Laurel’s mission to take down the Big Bad of the season than the Villain of the Week skirmish with Cupid. And you know I’m a card-carrying Laurel fan, so there’s that.

Her hair is bloody perfect all episode, too.

And she manages to get what she needs to keep Damien in jail without bail, and get the trial moving forward. Quentin’s testimony is indeed compelling. And there is a silver lining: Quentin makes sure to mention that Damien threatened to murder Laurel, and that’s why he submitted to his demands. So he might get out of this.

Felicity’s wedding dress is nice.

Like I said above, Damien’s lawyer cleverly throws Diggle’s testimony in doubt by bringing up the time recently when he helped Thea, also a witness to Damien’s “supposed” Christmas party attack, buy a tonne of cocaine. Good callback.

The idol in the cave absorbs souls or something, and Black Boss has a magic tattoo that lets him harness its power. Cute.

Oh, and I initially groaned at another rehashing of Cupid, but her campiness was a welcome reprieve from the grimness of William’s abduction and the death of Star City stuff. Cupid’s just a simple, psychopathic bitch. And in wanting to kill Oliver and Felicity, I at least agree with her in the killing Felicity part.

Arrow Broken Hearts Cupid

Sometimes I worry that I’m hyperbolising Felicity’s awfulness.
Just kidding.

Advertisements

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: