Pretty Little Liars Season 6 Episode 15 – TV Review

PLL Do Not Disturb Emily

Shay, honey. You haven’t got anything else.

I think my favourite part about this second half of the season has got to be that Pretty Little Liars is making Cece’s murder the new big, important mystery

Because Pretty Little Liars seems to think that anyone, anywhere, would give even a quarter of a fuck about Cece.

Why wasn’t PLL nominated in the Comedy categories at the Golden Globes?

TL;DR The characters in the fucking show only care about Cece’s murder insofar as the investigation inconveniences them; Byron isn’t involved, by the way; Sara is the new suspect dujour, which means more screentime for her; Ashley appears to have destroyed the surveillance footage backup hard drive for good, because it’s gone.

And yes, Hanna made sure to check if it was in the lasagna box.

Liars, you’re up:

Emily gets a bit of a spotlight this episode as it’s come time to harvest her eggs for that money, honey. Alison steps up to the plate and is there for her during her hospital stay. Or is she, as Emily thinks she is attacked by Sara while drugged up, but Alison claims that nobody was there. In any case, Emily’s egg buyers back out, so she’s left penniless and empty.

Hanna ransacks her house trying to find the surveillance hard drive, as B demands it and threatens to blow up her relationship with Jordan (oh. No. Please don’t. Think of the chemistry). She can’t find it, so Caleb mocks up a fake one to use in a wider scheme to lure Sara (who everyone presumes is B) out of her hotel room so Aria and Spencer can sneak in to retrieve Byron’s incriminating 9 iron.

Sara is the new prime suspect because it turns out Byron’s secret is that he’s back together with Ella, and she tells Aria that they were banging at the time of Cece’s murder. During the search of Sara’s room, Aria goes missing through a secret passageway in the closet. No. Please don’t.

And Spencer’s appointment schedule is messed with, and she thinks B was trying to set up her and Yvonne into meeting and butting heads. Yvonne leaves her phone at lunch, so Spencer gets it to Caleb so he can try to trace back the bogus message from “Spencer” to meet at lunch. During the raid of Sara’s room, Spencer finds floor plans that show Sara’s hotel room is the same as Cece’s room during her stay at old school Radley.

And Alison makes her pathetic return. Apart from grovelling to Emily (or is she!?), she puts out her budding romance with that doctor dude, and gets a visit from Sara. Sara says she was super good friends with Cece, despite throwing her under the bus at trial, and wants to be super good friends with Alison, now. Alison, because she has no traces left of her former fun mean girl self, does not reject her outright.

There’s also a subtle hint that Alison and Sara might fuck. Which would give them both a much needed boost in their “why should I care about watching these idiots” appeal.

So, to continue my train of thought from the last few episodes, we’re still yet to totally jump off the slippery slope into the worst kinds of PLL slop.

But, and I must stress this, who the hell cares about Cece’s murder?

B needs to get out there and do something that the characters would actually be invested in. Because right now, it’s embarrassing to see not one of our leads really that bothered by this murder mystery that the show is pushing so bloody hard to be meaningful.

 

Why I hate this episode:

The only character who we have seen give a shit about Cece’s murder is Alison, and as of this episode, she seems to have let it go.

Alison, as is becoming her style, is one of the worst things about the episode. Her minor flirtation with not-that-hot doctor dude is effectively stamped out, and her scenes with Sara just give more screentime to Sara, who we definitely do not need more of. The only interesting thing she does is maybe lie to Emily about nobody being in her room at the hospital, but I was reaching pretty hard for that. The way the show presents it leaves only a tiny sliver of possibility that Emily’s encounter with Sara was real.

Just when you thought the mythical, gothic, hyperbolic evil of Radley had been renovated away, here comes a secret passage behind a wall in a closet. For fuck’s sake.

Hanna and Jordan continue to show no chemistry, which is becoming tiring for me to mention. But I will keep mentioning it, because I’m a redundant nag.

Mona appears again just to give Spencer shit about “stealing” Yvonne’s phone. Hey, if Yvonne is dumb enough to leave her phone on the floor next to her direct campaign enemy, then TFB, baby.

Caleb’s backtracing of Yvonne’s phone (to cross reference the sender of the message to meet Spencer for lunch with the B texts from the Liars) leads him to the Phillips campaign network. He briefly hovers over accessing Mona’s computer (which would have been way cooler), and opts to try to look through their file on the Hastings. He is shocked to find it’s password protected, and he stops there. Umm, what do hackers do, again?

Early in the episode, Caleb suggests to Spencer that they go straight to the police with the B texts. I tried screaming “yes” into the TV screen, but Spencer just rabbited on about how they wanted to prove it was Sara, first, and left it at that. It’s like nobody listens to me, sometimes.

Emily takes a swipe at Hanna for referring to her friends’ parents by their first names. Bitch, that’s normal. Also, you guys are in your twenties. Grow the fuck up.

Hanna is jealous of Caleb and Spencer. Still.

After Emily gets home from hospital (and having decided to donate her eggs for free, rather than destroy them or pay to keep them in storage for herself), she gets a taunt from B: a carton of eggs and a note telling her to give up the killer or they’ll use the eggs. But Emily doesn’t know who the killer is, right? They thought it was Byron, but it’s not. Ezra is still on the table, but they don’t have confirmation. Is B asking them to dob in Ezra? I don’t get it.

Oh, and Caleb rigs the fake surveillance hard drive with a video taunt from him (and on the Liars’ behalf). And a virus that ruins B’s computer. First of all, and considering B’s thrown down the “I’m better than A” gauntlet, that’s not going to be enough. Ezra wasn’t even a real A, and he had a tech-fabulous, Bond villain base. And look at what fucking Cece got up to. She had a goddamn super bunker. Pissing on a single laptop ain’t gonna cut it, Caleb.

 

But it’s not all bad:

Spencer and Caleb are still having sex, so that’s nice for them.

Despite their cordial behaviour last episode, Spencer still clearly wants to throw Yvonne into an industrial shredder, as she can barely stomach their lunch together. Which I suppose makes the decision to steal and plunder her phone easier. Way to go, baby.

Aria gets some surprise points this episode for the scheme she devises to lure Sara out of her hotel room. Hanna is freaking out over the surveillance hard drive, because she can’t find it and B wants it. So Aria suggests they just contact B, anyway, and claim to have the drive and arrange a fake drop-off for Hanna to make. Aria will book the hotel room next to Sara’s, wait for her to leave to pick up the drive, and then go in to retrieve the 9 iron. That’s clever, Aria. You’ve earned it.

Hanna’s subplot with her boss isn’t related to the relevant arcs, but her bitchy, airhead boss is played by the immortal Amy Yasbeck. And with cruel relish. After getting fired for only minor issues, Hanna blasts her boss for being the incompetent piece of human rubbish she is. The boss then makes the typical Bad Boss retort that Hanna better crawl and beg for her job back, and maybe she’ll get it. But Hanna is like “Nah, cunt,” and storms out. She later regrets the fact that she’s now unemployed, but she burned bright when it mattered.

Byron and Ella’s reunion is cute.

Emily gets best line of the episode after Alison tells her about how magnanimous Sara appeared to be, and how she thinks Sara might have actually cared about Cece: “Why would you believe a word she says?” Right?

Oh, and Hanna leaves no lasagna box unturned during her search for the surveillance hard drive. The callback is quick and downplayed, which is refreshing for PLL.

PLL Do Not Disturb Hanna lasagna box

Hefty Hanna rises.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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