The Originals Season 3 Episode 7 – TV Review

The Originals Out of the Easy Aurora crap hair

The wig department hates her as much as the audience does.

Does this bitch seriously think she holds a candle to Camille? Or Hayley? Or motherfucking Katherine?

Get out.

TL;DR The Mikaelsons hold an interrogation Thanksgiving dinner in an effort to divide the Sire Line Three/get Rebekah back, with mixed results; they do not get Rebekah back; Jackson and Hayley’s marriage is on the rocks (fuck yes!); Marcel and Vincent have Davina deposed as Regent for her own safety; Aurora abducts Camille.

That’s two hot blondes she’s abducted in two consecutive episodes. You’re not going to get any hair points by eliminating your hair competition, honey. Give it up.

So Elijah and Klaus are still doing an admirable job of working together. Along with an increasingly unstable Freya (who knew she liked Rebekah so much?), they scheme to have the Sire Line Three over for Thanksgiving dinner to interrogate them about a) Rebekah’s location; and b) their plan to imprison the Originals. It turns out that nobody, not even Aurora, knows where Rebekah is (Aurora arranged for her goons not to tell her, and she and Tristan each have a hidden envelope with one half of the co-ordinates for where the coffin is in the fucking ocean. So obtuse). But Lucien apparently caves under the pressure and relinquishes the special medallion to Klaus. Meanwhile, Camille, who has just escaped from her vampire babysitter, is captured by a jealous Aurora. Yes, honey. The important thing to take away from an interrogation dinner about your plans to imprison your vampire sires is that your ex-boyfriend of several hundred years ago has a new love interest. Who said feminism was dead? Meanwhile, Elijah tasks Marcel with keeping Davina safe from the Sire Line Three’s plan to use her in activating the imprisonment spell. Davina is her usual, impetuous self, so Marcel calls on Vincent, who manipulates Davina into bragging about the witch massacre so all the witches can hear. She is viciously stripped of her Regent title, has her magic link to the ancestors severed, and is excommunicated from all witches in New Orleans. But hey, it worked. And Jackson bitches at Hayley for helping the Mikaelsons with their interrogation dinner instead of spending Thanksgiving with him and Hope.

Oh no. Don’t break up. The horror. How will we ever go on?

I must say, all this dastardly Thanksgiving scheming is giving me the Gossip Girl chills. The Thanksgiving episodes were routinely on the better end of the spectrum on that show. And if it wasn’t for Aurora’s bad hair, this episode of The Originals could confidently add itself to that Gossip Girl-laden pantheon.

Bloody Aurora.

 

Why I hate this episode:

Really, queen? You put Rebekah at the bottom of the ocean? And then you hid her location even from yourself? Fuck you. What if your goons had died before they’d delivered the coordinate notes? What if they’re lying? What an utterly near-sighted plan.

The Thanksgiving dinner is all nice and hostile, but I don’t know why Klaus and Elijah don’t just use their compulsion to get the truth out of the Sire Line Three. Yeah, Aurora doesn’t know where Rebekah is. But they could have gotten a straight answer about the imprisonment plan much quicker. And if the Sire Line Three are on vervain, then tie those idiots up and bleed it out of them. Gosh.

Or, like, just kill them? If their subordinates rise up to take their place, just kill them, too? Klaus never really understood the value of just fucking murdering everyone in his way. It would be so efficient.

When the Sire Line Three are split up for individual interrogation, Aurora is handled by Freya and Hayley. Another Designated Girl Fight like last episode’s Rebekah/Aya scrap. Come on, CW. You can be more progressive than this.

Aurora has crap hair.

Elijah chews the scenery too much at dinner.

Tristan suggests more than once that the Originals should allow themselves to be imprisoned for their own safety. Apparently the death prophecy only encompasses a year, so they’ll be free and easy after that. Oh, Tristan. Honey. That is way too fucking suss. Also, why is Alexis so fucking special now? Who knows if the prophecy was even accurate?

Oh, and I want to bitch about Jackson. I really do. But his overreaction is laying the foundation for a breakup with Hayley, and I can’t argue against that.

 

But it’s not all bad:

Jackson and Hayley might be breaking up. I’ll put the pre-celebration goon in the cooler.

Camille keeps up her strong season by being the scene-stealer of the episode. Yeah, the interrogation dinner is important for the plot and all that, but Aurora’s crap hair is in that plot thread, so blah. What’s more fun is watching Camille pout around Lucien’s penthouse while he waits for the vervain to pass from her system so he can compel her to forget about her abduction. He leaves her with a burly vampire babysitter while he goes to the dinner, and Camille doesn’t sit around and wait for no man to rescue her. She first tries getting hold of one of the magic weapons, but is intercepted. So then she feigns drunkenness to get the babysitter off guard, smashes a beer bottle, and uses the jagged end to tear the dude’s daylight ring off. He retreats to the shadows and she’s out with a bang. Fuck, she’s incredible.

Sadly, she is immediately caught by Aurora, who is rightly jealous of Camille. Because Camille is so, so much better.

Camille turns out to be one of Klaus’ berserk buttons (not that Klaus really needs an excuse to fly into a rage, but I appreciate the sentiment), as he flips the fuck out and threatens Lucien with death if he doesn’t return Camille unharmed. Things get worse when Lucien can’t deliver, but Lucien manages to placate Klaus by handing over the medallion.

Klaus then shines in the episode’s best line, which he mournfully leaves on Camile’s voicemail as he fails to contact her: “I need… I need to know you’re safe.” That’s your queue to take your ratty hair and give up, Aurora. He don’t want you, no.

Klaus’ other berserk button, which also works on Elijah and Freya, is the revelation from Aurora that Rebekah is at the bottom of the ocean. Once that’s out of the bag, the pleasantries cease and the individual interrogations quickly begin. I love it.

I had no complaints about the Davina subplot because it is perfect. Davina is in danger from the Sire Line Three because she’ll either have to help them imprison the Originals, which would make friends like Marcel upset. Or, if she refuses, they’ll kill her. So by having her deposed as Regent, she’s no longer in the Sire Line Three’s crosshairs. The fact that she gets outed for her murder of her charges is just a big plus. Swishy Witch Boy rides again.

Vincent enacted the plan by coercing Davina into talking about the massacre in private and using one of those surveillance dreamcatchers to broadcast the admission to the witches. Clever.

Speaking of clever, Lucien admits that the entire Glasgow smile serial killer case was all a big ruse to get Camille falsely arrested so the police could enter her residence and seize the magical objects. Lucien and Tristan couldn’t get in there because they hadn’t been invited. That’s smart, baby.

Oh, and abducting Rebekah is one thing. Klaus has done that enough times himself. But Aurora better put any hope for a future with Klaus out of her mind now that she’s abducted Camille. That kind of shit isn’t easily forgiven. Nor is that kind of crap hair.

The Originals Out of the Easy Camille abducted

Ain’t nothing wrong with the body.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

5 responses to “The Originals Season 3 Episode 7 – TV Review”

  1. Anonymous says :

    You’re missing the point that Aurora possibly have turned Camille, which means no head tearing.

  2. Anonymous says :

    I love these commentaries so much! I swear every last point ,even down to Aurora’s horrible hair, were things I thought while watching ! Thank you so much for this!!!!

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