iZombie Season 1 Episode 6 – TV Review

iZombie Virtual Reality Bites Liv high

Oh, thank God.

So Lowell might not only be a revenge killer, but he’s also down to deal some drugs when his lady friend needs them.

He’s a keeper.

TL;DR The COW victim is an Internet troll/hacker, but the episode isn’t a cringe-fest because of it; Lowell and Liv cosy up; Blaine kills Jackie; Liv’s family find themselves in Blaine’s sights; Major’s investigation into his missing street youths leads him towards Blaine.

It’s a small world.

The victim of the COW this episode is Simreaper, an abrasive Internet jerkface. He’s found in his basement a little bit ripe, and Liv dreads drinking his decomposed brains. She inherits his video gaming and hacking prowess, as well as his agoraphobia. As it turns out, his killer is the brother of a customer service rep whose life Simreaper had systematically destroyed (she posted an audio clip of Simreaper’s manchild ranting online. He was not amused), leading to her suicide. Death by poisoned confetti seems poetic enough, no? Meanwhile, Liv gets closer to Lowell, but she’s still pretty hung up on Major; Major finds some video footage of the Candyman (the hulking zombie who stole that kid’s shoes) with Blaine; Blaine puts Jackie down after she eats one of his delivery boys; and Liv’s mum, who we find out is a Meat Cute regular, gets her son a job application to fill the eaten delivery boy’s job.

You can’t put him in danger. Then he’ll never get the chance to consummate his crush on Aly.

Well, we’re six episodes deep now, and iZombie continues to do just enough to stay impressive. The COW format hasn’t worn me out yet.

But something tells me that a CW show won’t be able to resist the inevitable slide into serialised, soap opera territory. And that might be for the best.


Why I hate this episode:

While the COW reliance hasn’t gotten dull yet, I fear that it won’t be long before the cracks begin to show. The structure is too rigid and formulaic. I believe iZombie could be something better than a zombified variation of They Fight Crime.

The COW this week has an absurd explanation. The culprit reveals he purposely worked at several donut stores as a delivery driver in the hope of finding out where Simreaper lived, then laced a confetti card with peanut oil, which Simreaper was allergic to. It’s like, what?

Our culprit, a Mr Posy, then had the stupidity to have the confetti card play Ring Around The Rosy as a taunt so Simreaper would recognise who killed him. Well shucks, putting your own name into your murder calling card could never be used as evidence. Who would have thought that?

And Liv and Babineaux only connect the dots because, during their research on Simreaper, they happened to stumble upon the voice recording of him and Miss Posy. So tangential.

Let alone her annihilation from Simreaper, wouldn’t Miss Posy have been breaking the law by publicly releasing confidential recordings from her job? What a fucking idiot. Simreaper’s revenge was dumbass-on-dumbass crime. With extra dumbass icing when Mr Posy came revenge-ing.

Mr Posy also made sure to be present at the crime scene when the body was found, and be seen by the investigating officer. Jesus, you’re stupid.

Once he’s caught, he still considers killing Simreaper “worth it.” Nah, bro.

Liv can’t taste anything but hot sauce, so why should she give a shit about drinking decomposing brains? Just close your eyes, don’t breathe through your nose just to be sure, and chug, baby.

Oh, and Blaine presumably kills Jackie (what else will a drill to the brain earn you, really?). What a shame. She was ballsy.


But it’s not all bad:

Jackie is sure to make her final episode count. The Meat Cute delivery boy eats her order, then pretends that it must have been forgotten and offers to go back and get her another one. Unfortunately for his greedy butt, Jackie can’t wait that long, so she impales the back of his neck on a coat hook. We later see his head splattered open and eaten out.

The scene showing the body is supposed to be humorous as Jackie lies to Blaine on the phone about the delivery boy supposedly never showing up, but the level of gore connotes something more serious and tragic (I mean, he was just a hungry delivery boy. And only a teenager). iZombie might have some hidden depths in there, you know.

The COW avoids the horror of other crime shows’ attempts at involving online video gaming. Liv and Ravi (who we are not so surprised to discover is an avid player) play an MMORPG that Simreaper was famous on in an effort to find his killer. He apparently had a fiery relationship with another player, but it turns out to be a fourteen year-old kid on the other side of the country. The MMO stuff then essentially evaporates from the episode, and never gets its chance to be embarrassing. Good.

Liv’s mum walks into the apartment during an intense session and is just happy to see Liv engaged with something for once. Aww.

Speaking of Liv’s mum, she notices Blaine is looking for a new Meat Cute delivery driver and offers to have her son apply. Tension!

Major finally makes a breakthrough with his investigation (the beating last episode doesn’t count). He notices one of his other street youth mentees has skate park footage and combs through it, eventually finding the Candyman in a frame. He shows Ravi, and Blaine is sitting right next to him. Ravi later shows Liv, so now they know what he’s up to.

In Blaine’s defence, he may be an evil brain tycoon, but he seems at least somewhat interested in keeping the zombie problem under his control. I assume that’s why he kills Jackie: because she’s homicidally unpredictable.

Lowell tells Liv that he became a zombie when he woke up with a scratch after a night of binge drinking on a bachelor party. So we now know for certain that the boat party isn’t the only time zombies have appeared. Hmm.

Lowell says he can’t perform live music anymore because the adrenaline rush of performing on stage automatically activates rabid mode. Liv consoles him. Sadly, not with her vagina.

Because she’s still hung up on Major, of course. It told you it was a CW show.

Lowell gives Liv some anti-anxiety medication to help her overcome her agoraphobia so she can go see Babineaux. Rose McIver shows off some respectable drunk acting skills.

Ravi enjoys Liv’s discomfort over having to consume Simreaper’s rotten brains. As did I.

Oh, and I’ll remember Jackie as she was: horny and hungry. And with an even spray tan.

iZombie Virtual Reality Bites Jackie

“I regret wearing a white blouse this morning, though.”

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

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