The Originals Season 2 Episode 9 – TV Review

The Originals The Map of Moments Elijah Hope Rebekah baby

Too late.

I’m sorry, you’ll have to excuse me while I clean myself up.

And then go again, and then clean myself up again.

TL;DR Klaus and Hayley reunite with Hope; the team schemes against Lenore, but Rebekah ends up in a new body she didn’t want; Lenore ends up sired and imprisoned, though; Kaleb and Davina further their plan to make the anti-Klaus dagger.

There’s also a diamond MacGuffin, which is disappointing.

The plot starts off with Rebekah and Elijah awaiting a rendezvous with Klaus and Hayley. They all meet up and play happy families for a little bit. Elijah is still having mind fuck episodes, but is otherwise lucid. Rebekah volunteers to pretend to go along with Lenore’s offer to implant her in a mortal body, so that the rest of the team can take the opportunity while the spell is being cast to kill Lenore, thus getting rid of Esther. Everyone is on board, but Kaleb does as Kol is known to do and twists things up a little bit, by allowing Rebekah to be transplanted to some random witch trapped in a house somewhere. This is because, back in 1914, Rebekah betrayed him to Klaus. The house is home to a bloodline of witches who were friends with Kol back then, and Klaus used a spell to trap them in there as punishment for scheming against him. The usual Mikaelson wheeling and dealing, you know? Meanwhile, Camille tries unsuccessfully to reason with Vincent, but that’s rendered moot when both the spell to implant her with Rebekah fails, and Mikael (in Lenore’s employ) liberates Vincent. Meanwhile, Davina and Kaleb get their hands on the Paragon diamond, which they need to complete the anti-Klaus dagger. And the episode ends with Lenore waking up. Klaus cruelly informs her that he’s managed to turn her into a vampire (thanks to a little blood from Rebekah), and she ain’t go no magic no more.

Boom, bitch.

This isn’t the most action-packed episode of The Originals ever. And the drama of the episode hangs entirely on the premise that the Mikaelson siblings choose to trust each other. Which, given Kol is involved, should have been seen to fail from miles away.

But whatever. We’ve got Elijah holding a baby, for fuck’s sake.

It’s beautiful.


Why I hate this episode:

Seriously, though. Good work trusting Kol, everyone.

Special demerit points to Lenore on that one. She is by far the worst off after his betrayal. It’s about time she realised she won’t be able to fix a family this broken, and return to her quest to just murder them all.

I find it preposterous that Mikael would entertain teaming up with Esther. Surely he’d hate her more than he’d hate Klaus.

The logistics of the house witches is confusing. So every witch in their bloodline has lived every moment of their lives inside that house? Why did they even bother procreating if it meant their family would have to suffer like that? It’s just a weird development.

Vincent is a rambling, moralistic puritan during his meeting with Camille. He calls her a slut for bed-hopping between Klaus and Marcel. Nobody goes after my Camille like that. And certainly not for scoring two hotties. Finn is just jealous.

Oh, and Elijah’s mind fucking seems to be pushing him towards accepting Esther’s offer. Ew, no.


But it’s not all bad:

Elijah. Holding a baby.

Elijah follows up on this sexy feat by later having sexy sex with Hayley. She confesses to him that she’s going to be getting married to Jackson to help the werewolves. He agrees with the plan, as it’s the most pragmatic course of action to work to ensure a safe future for Hope in New Orleans. Then he and Hayley abruptly get their bang on. I approve. Two people this perfect-looking should be together.

Camille, as seems to be her MO, doesn’t actually have much power or influence over things, but still manages to be a commanding presence. Vincent berates the hell out of her at their meeting, but she doesn’t let it get her down. Despite the fact she is a squishy human, she’s not pushover. I like it.

She is also spared having her body used as a vessel. Thank goodness.

Kaleb may be a shady little bitch, but for the most part, he does bat for Team Klaus. He just sneaks in the little twist on Rebekah to punish her for her century-old transgression. Kaleb does do what he promised to help Klaus kill Lenore. And he does return the invinci-stake (which he had to pretend to be giving to Lenore as part of the ruse) to Klaus at the end of the episode. I’m angry that Rebekah had to pay the price, but I’ll give Kol the credit he’s due for otherwise being true to his word.

He and Davina are also back on romantically. Which I’m sure she’s glad about.

Lenore and Mikael’s meeting is cute and bickery. He has a whinge at her for reviving Ansel, her adulterous lover. Then she’s like “Don’t worry, he’s dead already.” I lol’d.

Rebekah appears to have at least been able to keep her British accent in her new, hot body. So that’s nice.

Klaus tells Hayley, Rebekah, and Elijah about the whole thing with Freya and Esther’s sister. They kind of shrug it off, but now that more people know, I hope Dahlia will soon make her appearance.

Oh, and Lenore’s realisation that Klaus has sired her into a vampire is glorious. It’s exactly the kind of fucking-over she deserves.

The Originals The Map of Moments Lenore Esther sired vampire

Or at least eat the blood. Because you need to.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

6 responses to “The Originals Season 2 Episode 9 – TV Review”

  1. Lydia says :

    Fucking brilliant. Finally.
    That’s all I have to say.

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