Arrow Season 2 Episode 8 – TV Review

Who would have thought that Sebastian would be the least attractive male in the cast of a show?

If you thought I was late posting the Once Upon a Time in Wonderland review this week, then I’ll have you know that I watched this episode of Arrow 5 days ago.

You’d think Oliver’s abs would be more of a priority for me.

But hey, if Laurel can choose alcoholism over Oliver, then so can I.

TL;DR Sebastian (Arrow Sebastian, not Glee Sebastian) has a super powered goon who is under the influence of the same serum that flashback Oliver is on the trail of; Barry Allen (Sebastian from Glee) helps the investigation; Moira makes a lukewarm return to the social circuit; Sin, Roy and Thea struggle to stay relevant.

Even with Roy’s cheekbones? This is indeed a disturbing universe.

So yeah, the main plot involves that goon Sebastian experimented on last episode being all crazy strong and stealing an industrial centrifuge. Oliver gets on the trail, and a pretty young inspector from Central City named Barry Allen shows up to help out. He eventually reveals that he’s acting of his own volition to find answers relating to his mother’s murder, and together the team catches up with the goon. Oliver fights him, but ends up injected with the serum at the end of the episode. This is not good, because the flashback plot shows our heroes tracking down that same serum on the Japanese submarine. They administer it to Aussie guy and it kills him. Uh oh. Other Starling City subplots include Moira’s very average coming back party; Moira threatening Malcolm with Ra’s to get him to fuck off; Barry and Felicity wanting to bang each other; and Sin pretending she still exists by having a friend who died from one of Sebastian’s experiments.

Just fade away with dignity, baby.

Barry Allen is The Flash, btw, and his inclusion in Arrow worries me for 2 totally opposite reasons.

On the one hand, he could be much like his comic counterpart and have crazy superpowers, which would overshadow Oliver and ruin the gritty, real-world angle of the show.

On the other hand, and more likely, he could be totally un-special and boring. I mean, how do you do a gritty, non-crazy version of super speed? And if he doesn’t have any superpowers, then his inclusion is tantamount to fan wank.

And wanking is something you should do in the privacy and safety of your own shared living space.

Why I hate this episode:

Also, it’s Sebastian from Glee, which is just distracting. How am I supposed to take that seriously?

Felicity must be going blind if she sees Barry as a better option than Oliver. Why settle for less?

Felicity puts on way too much makeup (and crap hair) when she goes to Moira’s party.

Sin, Roy, and Thea’s role in the episode is blatantly so they can earn their obligatory lines. The only relevant thing that happens is when Oliver, in Hood form, shoots Roy in the leg to keep him out of the investigation (for his own safety).

Thea gets a slight bit of play when Moira chickens out of telling her she’s Malcolm’s daughter. I don’t see why Malcolm doesn’t just find some way to tell her himself. Mail her a paternity test or something.

Laurel isn’t in this episode. For shame.

Aussie guy dies. Now whose accent will I identify with?

Oh, and Felicity has to reveal Oliver and team’s secrets to Barry so he can help make a cure for Oliver’s serum poisoning. The things she’ll do for a little D. Good grief.

But it’s not all bad:

At least it frees up Oliver to focus more of his romantic intentions on Laurel.

The flashback plot is finally getting its shit together. The gang hurries along to the submarine so they can find the serum and save Aussie guy’s life. Ivo is hot on their trail. Asian chick warns Oliver that the serum might kill Aussie guy if they don’t use any sedation, but they have no choice to try. Sadly, he does appear to die.

He does take the opportunity to confess his love for Asian chick before he does, though. Aww.

Speaking of Ivo, present day Oliver mentions that he’s dead. I know you need to take that with some skepticism in a comic book world, but I liked that tidbit. I hope his death is violent.

I lol’d when Oliver shot Roy in the leg. As long as he doesn’t harm the face or the abs.

Flashback Oliver has to explain the Sarah situation to Asian chick. She is predictably unimpressed.

Moira does a decent job of fucking Malcolm off. Personally, I don’t think she did tell Ra’s about him, but if there was one card she needed to play, it was that one.

Isabel is not happy to see Moira back on the Queen Consolidated board. She tells Oliver it’s bad PR and wants him to deal with it. She and Moira have tension at the party later. Sharpen those claws, ladies.

The fight choreography between Oliver and the super goon is fantastic, as is typical of Arrow. Keep up the good work.

Super goon’s muscle density is so strong that it bends Oliver’s arrows. Cool.

Felicity kidnaps Barry to get him to help cure Oliver. You know, as opposed to just asking him to come. At least she has some man-bagging prowess.

Oh, and Aussie guy’s death gets to be sad and disgusting at the same time. So delectable.

For some reason, their Eye Puke flavour never caught on.