The Vampire Diaries Season 5 Episode 6 – TV Review

TVD Katherine grey hair

Not when you’re around, Katherine. Baby.

With Qetsiyah and Katherine in charge this episode, it’s all bitches. All the time. Always.

Heaven is a place on Earth.

TL;DR Damon, Jeremy and Silas track down the anchor, but it’s complicated; Qetsiyah is sequestered with Stefan and Elena. She is bitchy to them; Katherine and Caroline team up to learn more about Doctor Evil and his secret society; Bonnie is still dead.

Phew.

The major plot this episode concerns Qetsiyah (I’m not calling her Tessa. Silas’ name is still “Silas.” This name upgrade is silly) and Silas’ race to find the anchor. Now that he’s been cured of vampirism, Silas has his witch powers back, so he spell-locks Qetsiyah and Stefan inside her cabin. Elena turns up out of concern, but is trapped inside with a very snarky Qetsiyah and a seemingly apathetic Stefan. But twist, Stefan, even with his amnesia, still cares for Elena, and looks out for her. Pfft. Meanwhile, Damon, Jeremy and Silas find the anchor. It’s Amara (Origi-lena). Silas un-dessicates her, but she immediately tries to suck all the cure blood out of him because she can’t stand to live any longer (Silas’ blood is the cure now). Aww. Meanwhile at college, Caroline joins forces with Katherine to extract some deets about the secret society from Doctor Evil. The society knows all about vampires (and apparently has one of their own). Katherine also wants Doctor Evil to help her overcome an onset of “my body is fucking falling apart and I’m dying.”

You know, the usual.

I finally understand what the scheme was, btw. So Silas wanted to destroy the anchor, which would abolish the Other Side. So then he could die and not be trapped there. Qetsiyah wanted him trapped there so his punishment could endure. I feel like I’m up to speed now.

Really, apart from Stefan’s stupid attachment to Elena, there’s not much to spit bile at here. I’m sure one day I’ll have had enough of Katherine being a marvellous bitch. But that day is not today.

 

Why I hate this episode:

I know it was coming a mile off, but it was very disappointing to see Stefan turn around and stab Qetsiyah so he could escape with Elena to safety. I can’t imagine the level of frustration it must cause Qetsiyah herself.

With Amara all reanimated, we now have 3 Nina Dobrevs running around. The poor girl is acting herself ragged. It’s kind of too much at this point, and it feels like they’re rubbing this doppelganger stuff in our faces now.

Nadia (Prague Chick) is absent.

Katherine is dying. Noooo!

Bonnie pops up a couple of times to collect her martyr points. Shh.

A pair of Travellers attack Damon at the warehouse the anchor is in. They use a spell to nullify his daylight ring. Insted of being defeated by this, Damon just vamp-whooshes through the narrow patch of light and rips some hearts out. Duh. How have the Travellers survived this long?

Oh, and Qetsiyah ends the episode by returning Stefan’s memories to him. Welcome back to the love triangle.

 

But it’s not all bad:

On the other hand, Qetsiyah only does it to hurt him, and it looks to be very painful. Qetsiyah is the curator of spite.

Qetsiyah almost out-struts Katherine this episode for Most Delicious And Petty Bad Bitch. Her endless stream of insults to Elena are worthy of the K-Meister herself. One of the choice ones would have to be when she straight-up calls Elena “codependent.” Nailed it.

She also takes plenty of time to gloat about how easy it was to manipulate Elena into coming to the cabin so she could trap her and use her as a chip against Damon (Qetsiyah threatens to kill Elena if Damon doesn’t kill Silas before he can destroy the anchor). She very rightly earns herself best line of the episode when discussing what she and Stefan could cook for dinner:
Qetsiyah: “Roasted duck?”
Stefan: “Oh, wait. Do you have a duck?”
Qetsiyah: “No. Maybe I could lure one inside. I got Elena in. How much smarter could a duck be?”
Ooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Damon tries his best with a reference I can appreciate: “New Jersey? The supernatural otherworld is bound by an object in Snooki‘s backyard?” It’s nice that someone still thinks Snooki is relevant.

Next to Qetsiyah’s fabulosity, Caroline and Katherine’s team up is the highlight of the episode. Katherine is crashing at the dorm because she has nowhere else to go, and it takes Caroline about 2 seconds to realise she isn’t Elena. Katherine offers to help Caroline foil Doctor Evil (Caroline was packing to go, having apparently heeded his advice from last episode).

So they tie him up and drain his blood of vervain so they can compel him. The whole scene has a very sexy doctor vibe.

Thinking she’s Elena, Doctor Evil says she was going to be invited to join Augustine, the secret society, but her invitation was decided against once they suspected she was a vampire. Katherine, still assumed to be Elena, waltzes right past the threshold of the house where the meeting is, dispelling those suspicions from the society. She’s a smooth criminal.

They also learn that Augustine has a vampire, who they believe to be responsible for Caroline and Elena’s roommate’s death (so it isn’t Jesse).

Caroline compels Doctor Evil to forget all about them being vampires, but Katherine returns at the end of the episode, reveals herself to not be Elena, and demands his help in finding out what’s wrong with her. Her body is falling apart, evidenced by a grey streak of hair and an errant tooth.

She also has a ravenous hunger. She binge orders at a restaurant to celebrate not dying, and at the meeting, she stuffs her face at the snack table. What must Aaron think?

Qetsiyah making Amara the anchor is some sneaky ass shit. It totally works, too, because not only does Silas not destroy her, he revives her from dessication. And she tries to suck him dry so she can die. The episode ends with Silas MIA and Amara kidnapped by Damon and Jeremy so they can keep her away from Qetsiyah.

Amara is also tormented by some invisble force that she yells at. I guess being virtually a statue for a couple thousand years would mess you up. And to Nina Dobrev’s credit, she does make her voice and manner distinct from Elena and Katherine.

Bonnie hasn’t been resurrected yet. Good. Keep it that way.

Oh, and I wasn’t kidding about the sexiness in the tie-up scene. Somehow, I don’t think anything with a vagina is Doctor Evil’s type, but a new ship is never a bad thing.

TVD Katherine Caroline Doctor Maxfield

“You were both thinking it.”

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

6 responses to “The Vampire Diaries Season 5 Episode 6 – TV Review”

  1. Amadan says :

    i couldn’t wait to read it!!
    thanks also for explaining silas plan.
    kathroline team was the highlight of my week

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