TV Review: Glee Season 4 Episode 21
And before you break out your Politically Correct sticks and take a swipe at me, know that Mercedes’ size is relevant to the episode.
Which means I can ridicule her for it all I want. Bwa ha.
Alright alright, only a little bit.
Or, in Mercedes’ case, not so little.
Okay, I’ll stop.
TL;DR No I won’t. Because her subplot is stupid, selfish and embarrasingly hypocritical. Kurt gets another chance to wangst about his dad’s health, and Rachel learns that K-Hud might care about her after all.
So the episode is mostly at McKinley. Kurt is back in town to go to his dad’s appointment where they’ll find out if his cancer is gone. Because that’s the kinda thing you need your child to leave New York for. It’s gone, btw. Blaine starts to get that lovin’ feeling back (again) and asks Burt’s permission to propose to Kurt. He says no (but not really). Ugh. Meanwhile, Mercedes and Mike are back to shoot a music video for her upcoming debut single. She finds out that her producer will drop her record deal if she doesn’t flash some more skin in a photo shoot for the album cover. Instead of doing her job, Mercedes has a shitfit about doing things her way and fucks her record label off. Oh, you. Meanwhile, Kitty flirts aggressively with Artie, who is hesitating with his acceptance to some film school. It works out. And over in New York, Rachel faces resistance from Kate Hudson over her callback. It works out, though, when K-Hud reveals she only pushes her hard because she wants her to succeed.
Because an original thought in a Glee episode would trigger the apocalypse.
Blaine’s proposal aside (oh, we’ll get to that in a minute. Don’t you worry), this episode is a fucking retarded example of how overbearing the “follow your dreams” message can become. Mercedes has a record deal. She’s recorded the music. It’s all ready to go. All she has to do is a fucking photo shoot and she can get her shit out there. And it’s not like her producer wants her to do a Nicki Minaj. He asks her to take a fucking shawl off during the previous photo shoot and she gets in a huff about it.
Being a popular musician isn’t just about singing, bitch. The whole package is your career. No, it’s your job. And if you don’t want to do your job, don’t expect everyone to allow you to be the diva piece of shit brat you are. Mercedes even openly admits that, by choosing to leave her record deal, she may never reach stardom. Then why did you leave, dickhead?
On the other hand, the Stevie Wonder songs (it’s the theme this week. Wonder-ful. Get it?) are mostly unoffensive.
Why I hate this episode:
Fuck you, Mercedes. You finally get a plot line this season, and it’s terrible. I’d be more disappointed if I was at all surprised.
Blaine wants to marry Kurt. Shut the fuck up, cunt. Burt (thankfully refusing permission for it. Ish) points out Rachel and Finn, who did the same thing. And look what happened to them. Blaine, naturally, is all like “we’re different!” Who do you think you are? Serena Van Der Woodsen? Shut up and do some goddamn schoolwork. You’re a teenager.
Where the hell did the Kitty/Artie thing come from? Wasn’t she after Blake’s dick just last episode? Artie doesn’t deserve her.
He tells her about how he’s gonna reject his Brooklyn Film Academy acceptance, then asks her to keep it a secret. He has met Kitty before, right? What an idiot. And to Kitty’s credit, she promptly tells literally everyone. That’s what you get, Artie.
Mercedes hires Mike to choreograph her music video. So apparently her record company is so controlling that they’ll drop her over a photo shoot, but she’s got free rein to do whatever she wants with the video?
Rachel neglected to get staff permission from NYADA (namely, K-Hud) to do the whole Funny Girl audition process. I find it hard to believe that someone as fastidious as Rachel would make that mistake.
The song Kurt sings to Burt in front of the glee club after the clear test results is awkward and weird. Which is Kurt’s thang.
Mercedes disses Kitty. Not cool.
Alex gets one of I Just Hate Everything’s rare worst lines. Mercedes is about to start singing a song, and Alex is super dooper excited: “Ooh, child, this is happenin’!” Stop trying to be so bloody sassy.
Oh, and to cover that hypocrisy I mentioned in the TL;DR, Mercedes sings a song to celebrate her integrity. Then during the performance, she removes her jacket and shows exactly the amount of skin her producer was asking for at the original photo shoot. Glee isn’t even trying anymore.
Reasons to watch:
Rachel’s subplot is the most watchable. Not only is K-Hud back, but the 2 bitchy gay guys return, too. I love them. They prove that no matter what your race, you can still be a terrible, vapid hero to us all.
And despite the cliché of the cruel-to-be-kind teacher, I was still happy when K-Hud showed her true colours and had everyone band together to help Rachel. Mainly because in the previous scene, she got to indulge her mean streak and wish Rachel all the failure in the world. If my obesity proves anything, it’s that I like to have my cake and eat it, too.
Tina is angered by the reappearance of Kurt, Mercedes and Mike. Me too, bro.
Tina also has a veterinary school lined up if her showbiz dreams don’t pan out. Are you listening, Mercedes?
Katey Sagal (Leela from Futurama) is Artie’s mum.
Artie’s subplot is refreshingly grounded. His fear of leaving home is genuine. And unlike Becky’s fear of graduation, it’s given enough attention to have some real impact.
Kitty gets a couple of choice moments. She calls Artie “Crippy Longstocking.” I lol’d.
She forces Artie into realising he wants to go to Brooklyn Film Academy. Smart.
And she calls out Mercedes for being 1 step away from working at a fast food drive-through. And guess what happens to Mercedes’ record deal? Kitty is prophetic.
Mercedes’ single is Hell To The No, which was actually one of the better orignal songs Glee has spat out. It’s no Trouty Mouth, but it’s still cool.
Kurt is being a major drama queen at the doctor’s office. Burt tells him to calm the fuck down and shut up. Satisfying.
Best line goes to K-Hud. After admitting she was being a bitch for Rachel’s own good, Rachel needs to clarify:
Rachel: “Even the whole Brodie thing?”
K-Hud: “That was because of his abs.”
Even after being denied by Burt, Blaine appears to still want to propose. He chickens out at the last minute, though. Keep it up.
Oh, and I’m just glad Glee has finally remembered that Mercedes still hasn’t lost any weight. Even if it took a smarmy, unscrupulous, British record producer to call her out on it. They heard me.