TV Review: Glee Season 4 Episode 18

Glee Lord Tubbington

Sadly, this is not as low as this episode goes.

Holy shit, are you serious? The episode’s title is “Shooting Star?”

And I thought my puns were tasteless.

The episode’s about a school shooting, FYI.

Yeah.

TL;DR I’d be offended if I expected anything better from Glee. But I don’t. Nobody does. I mean ffs, nobody even gets shot. What a waste of fucking time. Emotional pandering has never been this blatant.

There’s not even a real shooting. Get the fuck out.

So the “plot” is a trio of shit without meaning. The most obvious one is the “shooting.” The glee club are in the middle of a session when they hear gunshots. Will, along with Bieste who has joined him (something something he’s trying to let her down easy because she confessed her feelings for him. You don’t care), lock the kids in to protect them. Everyone tears up and whinges a bit. The police eventually give the all clear, and we later learn that Sue has taken the fall for Becky, who accidentally fired her dad’s gun, which was loaded with blanks. During the lockdown, Sam goes schiz trying to find Brittany, who wasn’t in class. He’s worried they’re growing apart, so is naturally trying to overcompensate by being a hero. Will shuts him down. The third “plot” is about Blake and his mystery internet girl. Turns out whoever it is was scamming him with a fake name and photo. And they’re in the glee club, too. He doesn’t find out who it is this episode.

Okay, so apart from all the glaring issues surrounding a show as vacuous as Glee trying to take on the school shooting issue so close to Sandy Hook, I have my own complaint.

Namely, that the shooting isn’t even real and nobody gets hurt or killed. Come on. If you’re gonna crack out the big guns (ah ha!) then at least use them. I can’t believe it not only turned out to be Becky (which was pretty obvious the whole time), but that she fired the gun by accident, in Sue’s office, and it was loaded with blanks. It’s like Glee was specifically trying to find every way to make it as anticlimactic as possible.

Worse, by throwing a gun in her hands, Glee diminishes the legitimate anxiety Becky has about leaving high school. A topic that Glee could actually handle with its limited capacity.

It’s a fucking disgrace.

Why I hate this episode:

Worse yet, Sue takes the fall by saying she accidentally set her own gun off while cleaning it, and is fired. It’s probably a mercy killing at this point, considering how absent and ineffective Sue has become, but way to throw a main character in the trash over nothing. Glee, you guys.

The other great travesty is a simple logic slip that I’m horrified nobody picked up on. So the glee club are all locked in the choir room. They all have their phones. Nobody. Calls. The. Police. It’s implied that someone did (the police show up later), but we never see a single one of our characters do it. Instead, Will encourages them to text and Tweet (Tweet. Yes, you heard) their friends and relatives to let them know they’re okay.

While in lockdown, the glee club start getting all emotional and confession-y. Artie thinks this would be a great time to start filiming everyone. Sensitive.

Kitty admits to Marley that she tricked her into becoming bulimic. And apologises. That’s not the Kitty I know and love.

The Blake/”Katie” plot had some potential, but it is squandered on melodramatic, overemotional bullshit.

Blake calls “Katie” while in lockdown and a phone within the choir room rings. Instead of going over to find it, he just sits there all weepy. Ugh.

The first half of the episode, where Brittany believes a comet is going to destroy the earth, is a recycle of the Christmas episode. At least the characters notice.

Blake says the reason he enjoyed getting to know “Katie” online was because there was no pressure about his looks. Umm?

Glee takes the term “catfishing” seriously.

Will sets Bieste up an account on eSymphony. Really? Fox couldn’t afford the the name for the real deal?

Tina was outside of the school during the “shooting,” so she was never in any “danger.” Damn. She does have a big cry later about how she wanted to share the experience of being trapped in the school with all her friendz. Someone get this bitch a noose.

Figgins and Sue have a discussion that quickly descends into an alarmingly didactic rant about gun politics. As an Australian who is against gun culture, even I found this rudely one-sided. You know, because there wasn’t an actual shooting.

Oh, and just to drive home how artificial the whole “shooting” situation is, there’s a super dooper melodramatic metronome just ticking away in the middle of the choir room the whole time. What the actual fuck?

Reasons to watch:

Seeing the characters in pain was fun, I guess.

The first half of the episode is devoted to Brittany trying to impress Lord Tubbington before the comet hits. This is, oddly, the most genuine relationship on the show.

Sam buys Brittany a Lady Tubbington at the end. Moar catz, plz.

Fake Katie (the girl whose picture “Katie” used) is a cute little thang. Her name’s Marissa (OC reference). And even after she figures out that someone’s been scamming Blake, she still down for him calling her. You get some, gurl.

She also looks like a young Christine Taylor. Cute.

I liked watching Bieste’s feelings get trampled by Will. That’s what you get for being an idiot.

Her eSymphony account does yield a message from Ken Tanaka. So the writers do know that season 1 existed. They’ve got some explaining to do.

Becky’s angst was the only honest thing about this episode.

Best line goes to Sue, who scoffs at Bieste and Will’s paranoia following the shooting: “Oh goodness, I haven’t seen this level of overreaction since Janet Jackson showed her saggy fun-bag at the Super bowl.” The comparison is eerie.

Second best line goes to Blake, who delivers this sublimely emo bitch at Marley and Jake when they offer to help him with his catfish problem: “I don’t want anything from anyone.” He later went home to Sharpie his fingernails and post Panic at the Disco lyrics on Facebook.

Sue named her gun (if it exists?) Uma Thurman.

Oh, and Will tries to save Sue’s job, as he is suspicious that there’s something more to her story. So he’s not totally oblivious all the time.

Glee Blake Ryder shooting call catfish

Just doesn’t have the same ring (ah ha!) to it.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

7 responses to “TV Review: Glee Season 4 Episode 18”

  1. David says :

    Don’t You Mean Ryder, Not Blake?

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