TV Review: Once Upon a Time Season 2 Episode 15

Once Upon a Time Hook stabs Gold Rumple

Well, if it’s Hook and Gold together, both options are fine.

Emma doesn’t get immediately forgiven by Henry following the revelation of her gargantuan betrayal.

That’s good.

Snow and David work on and almost succeed in a scheme, but are then brutally interrupted by Cora and Regina.

That’s also good.

Young Snow (in flashback) watches her mother die horribly.

God, everything seems pretty good so far. You’ll have to forgive my optimism. I know, I’m scared too.

TL;DR The plot moves forward, albeit at a crawl. No exceptionally stupid shit happens. Snow is overly sentimental, but that’s no shock.

Optimism validated? Good god.

So we’ve still got the 3 plot lines running thanks to Emma’s trip to New York. She and Gold are getting the cold shoulder from Henry and Baelfire. Aww. Hook then comes out of fucking nowhere and stabs Gold with his poisoned prosthetic. The gang resolves to return to Storybrooke to find magic that will cure him. Meanwhile in Storybrooke, Snow overhears Cora and Regina searching for the Rumple dagger. She and David begin their own hunt for it, culminating in their retrieval of it from the clock tower. But Regina and Cora show up with Snow’s childhood servant Johanna (Mrs Patmore from Downton Abbey. Amazing) and threaten her life. Being the predictable two-shoes she is, Snow aquiesces, only to lose the dagger and have Cora flick Johanna out the window. Oops. And over in flashback, we see Young Snow struggle with her mother’s illness. She is offered a cure by Blue Bitch, but it would cost someone else’s life, so she refuses, and is unable to prevent her mother’s death.

Also, Blue Bitch was actually Cora who was trolling the fuck out of her. And Snow ends the episode by coming to the conclusion that doing the right thing all the time has only produced death around her, and bitch is gon’ be more selfish from now on.

I like it.

If I had to find something to pick on, though, it’s that nothing really advances the plot in any significant way. Hook’s attack on Gold prompts Emma and co to decide to return to Storybrooke. But considering that the show is, you know, set in Storybrooke, I think we assumed that was happening anyway.

Likewise, Snow and David’s episode-long quest to find the dagger is solved effortlessly by a message from Gold. And then Regina and Cora end up with it anyway. I get that the purpose of the story is to make Snow regret being good all the time, but it’s still frustrating that Snow and David are simply just told where the dagger is without putting any effort into their search.

It also negates the coolness of Regina and Cora following a treasure map. Poor Hook’s pirate skills return to redundancy.

Why I hate this episode:

I’m still not sure if I’m entirely sold on Bailee Madison (Young Snow’s actress). Most of the time she’s surprisingly mesmerising, but she usually ends up going super overboard. She’s lucky that overacting suits fairy tales.

Young Snow is a bit of a snobbish bitch, too.

Regina has committed to being a dumbass. She genuinely believes Cora cares about her. Really?

The catalyst for Snow’s (although exciting) decision to abandon goodness is the death of Johanna. A character who bore exactly zero importance prior to this episode. Lazy writing.

And Johanna was Mrs Patmore from Downton Abbey. Having recently binge watched the entirety of Downton Abbey over the course of 3 days (yay, unemployment), I was tres devo.

The entire Storybrooke plot this episode is a result of Snow overhearing a very specific conversation between Regina and Cora. Out in the woods. By complete chance. That’s some Gossip Girl shit right there. Stop it.

Young Snow is too much of a pussy to use the life-for-a-life candle to save her mum. Rude.

Baelfire has some fiancé or something. Who cares?

Oh, and I know it’s a minor thing, but I’d like some clarification about exactly how the Storybrooke curse works. Nobody seems surprised that Hook ends up in New York with all his memories in-tact. So the curse only affected those who were brought over originally? For a show that usually goes to pains to explain every little thing, I feel like this is a strange omission.

Reasons to watch:

Yeah, she’s an arbitrarily brainwashed idiot, but Regina makes a refreshing return to evil this episode. She defiantly denounces the usefulness of being good (which Snow eventually agrees with. Omg), rightfully pointing out that it got her nowhere. She also gets to practice her heart-ripping on Johanna. Good times.

Henry is cold as fuuuuuuck to Emma. I feel like they put that in there just for me. Henry earns himself best line of the episode, which really is fucking sweet:
Emma: “You like the New York pizza?”
Henry: “Yeah. It’s delicious, cheesy, and doesn’t lie.”
Holy ouch.

Snow’s mum is played by Rena Sofer, who is incomparably beautiful. She’s really just perfect. Go Google image search her yourself. Sublime.

Cora reveals that Snow’s mum wasn’t sick: she was poisoned by Cora. Cora also impersonated Blue Bitch when Young Snow went to see her for a remedy. It was a win-win for Cora, too. Either mummy died (which she did), or Young Snow would corrupt herself by using the candle. Luckily for us, mummy’s death snowballed into Regina becoming queen. Which was also all part of Cora’s plan. The magnificent bitch.

Cora also orchestrated Regina’s rescue of Young Snow from her runaway horse. Did we already know that? I feel like it had been brought up before. Oh well.

After being stabbed, and suffering from the effects of the poison, Gold coldly blames Henry for it because he’s responsible for setting everything in motion. I lol’d.

Baelfire makes reference to some kind of history with Hook, and that the human realm isn’t the only one he’s been in since his disappearance from fairy tale land. Intrigue.

Emma and co decide to leave Hook tied up in New York so they can sail his invisi-ship back to Storybrooke. It’s not like she hasn’t ditched him before.

I’m pretty on-board for Snow’s renouncement of righteousness. She says she’s gonna kill Cora. I’d like to see her try.

Oh, and Cora and Regina are part murderously menacing, yet kinda “bumbling and overdressed business women trying to change a tire in the wilderness” fabulous. Duality is the spice of life.

Once Upon a Time Cora Regina digging

Only Spice World fans will get it. Yes, they are my core audience.

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

14 responses to “TV Review: Once Upon a Time Season 2 Episode 15”

  1. Tiann Nerng says :

    I think the best moment in this episode was the look on Emma’s face after Henry said his line LOL!!! it’s as if the writers had purposely blanked out that line from Jennifer Morrison’s script because her reaction was soooo genuine haha!

    Barbara Hershey, Lana Parilla and Ginnifer Goodwin better get some nominations for the next Emmys / Golden Globes!!!

    • ijusthateeverything says :

      Lana and Barbara for sure. Ginnifer? I’m not so fussed. I suppose it isn’t her fault for having such a bland character.

      Although I think that might change now. Hopefully.

      • Tiann Nerng says :

        yes I’m excited to see Snow Black emerge 😉 lol

        you have a point, her character is sorta bland when she’s being goody two shoes. I suppose that’s why I enjoyed the episode where Snow took the potion to forget Charming and become a total bitch lmao

  2. Manon says :

    I bet Baelfire was in Neverland with the Lost Boys ! Maybe we’ll see Peter Pan soon, and hopefully he’ll be all grown up and hot

  3. diana says :

    I am really concerned about the violence that keeps cropping up on this show, it was unnecessary for Cora to throw Johanna out the window, and how did Cora & Regina know they were in the bell tower? Too many times the story line is left with unanswered questions and incomplete scenes. Not sure if I will watch anymore

    • ijusthateeverything says :

      The violence is fine with me, though it is admittedly risqué for an ABC show.

      And I do agree that it’s strange Cora and Regina knew Snow and David were in the bell tower. If they knew Snow and David would find the dagger there, why didn’t they just go get it themselves?

      Maybe Cora just couldn’t pass up the opportunity to make Snow suffer. Because she’s a fabulous bitch.

    • Tiann Nerng says :

      perhaps Cora and Regina were secretly trailing MM and David. After all, if Cora can turn herself into the Blue Fairy, she probably can turn herself into a fly or something and eavesdrop and them …regarding Johanna, at least they didn’t make her drop with a nasty ‘crack’ sound with blood pooling everywhere

  4. Hiko says :

    I personally believed that young snow white, although I catch her over acting is very convincing as modern day snow white. The way young snow said her lines were almost spot on with how weird Snow white delivers her line. Just something I noticed.

    • ijusthateeverything says :

      Yeah, I find myself sometimes loving and sometimes hating Bailee Madison. She was pretty fantastic in Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark. But her expressions can be really strained.

      I’m sure she’ll get better as she gets older.

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