TV Review: The Vampire Diaries Season 4 Episode 9

The Vampire Diaries Caroline drama

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Holy shit, we finally get a break from Elena’s eternal indecision.

Instead we get to indulge Damon’s dilemma.

Thankfully, it does resolve by the end of the episode.

Unthankfully, this is TVD, so expect it to be immediately repealed next episode.

TL;DR At least we have enough hybrid slaughtering, secret spilling, relationship drama-ing action going on. The hybrids all die, Hayley reveals some of her plan to Tyler, April finds shit out, Damon makes the right choice about Elena and Jeremy might have that whole “I wanna kill my sister” thing under control.

Who knew TVD could cover so much ground so quickly. Anyone who watched season 3 (or most of this season so far) would be shocked.

I am shocked.

Anyway, the episode has 3 major plot threads. Bonnie, with the help of Professor Evil (who I’m just gonna call Shane from now on. Writing 2 words to name a character I don’t like is just too much fucking effort, you know?), tries to deprogram Jeremy’s vampire stabby-stabby side. Elena is on hand to test the progress out on, and Damon is there because he doesn’t trust Shane and is guilitly enjoying Elena’s sire bond induced devotion to him. Despite some setbacks, it looks like Jeremy is able to calm his shit down, and Damon makes the tough decision to tell Elena to go away. Meanwhile, Tyler and Hayley piece together a scheme to soul-jump Klaus into Tyler’s body, then encase it in cement so they can have some time to figure out how best to kill him. Caroline is none too pleased with this idea, and suggests they use Rebeka’s body instead. The plan falls apart, however, when Hayley comes clean to Tyler and tells him the whole thing was just a ruse to sacrifice the unsired hybrids, and Klaus massacres them. Meanwhile, Stefan and Caroline try to get their hands on that hunter sword Klaus dug up so they can find a cure. Tyler’s plan interferes with that and they clash. All this is rendered moot when Shane says he knows where the cure is. Oh, and April catches a neck-snapped Caroline (Oh, Hayley) and (unbeknownst to Caroline) resists the compulsion to forget about it because of Jeremy’s bracelet. And she finds Rebeka’s body in the coffin. Aww.

And Klaus drowns Carol. Fuck.

So TVD properly got some plot sorted out. Isn’t it amazing what you can do when you haven’t got that Bella shit clogging up your narrative? Learn from this.

But Damon still gets to waste far too much time wangsting about how he should let Elena go. Blah blah blah.

Stefan also massively flips his shit (and a chess board) when Caroline tells him that Damon is indulging Elena’s attention. Dude, you admitted things weren’t working, like, 3 episodes ago? Jesus.

Why I hate this episode:

Everyone is still unreasonably trusting of Shane. Even Damon, who openly calls him out multiple times on how shady he thinks he is and how he believes Shane is responsible for the council’s immolation, just rolls with the whole “Let’s put Elena in the same room as someone who literally cannot control his impulses to murder her.” Umm.

Despite Bonnie working some hypno-magic shit with Shane right there, there is no continuation of that evil “expression” stuff we heard about last episode. Hurry up!

For being the most powerful being evar, Klaus is pretty fucking clueless with his hybrids. He doesn’t realise until very late that they’re no longer sired to him. Badass decay sucks.

I’m also a bit confused as to what the procedure was supposed to be with hybrid sacrifice thing. So Shane was organising it with Hayley’s help, but Klaus was the one doing the massacring while both Hayley and Shane were nowhere nearby. I guess I just assumed it would be some witchy shit and they’d need to be, you know, involved in it. Maybe Bonnie can just suck the bad vibes out of the blood-stained dirt?

Caroline continues her duty of distracting Klaus with her lady-moves. Poor K-dizzle. Yeah, he’s onto her, but still. Mean.

Tyler loves his abritrary plot-blocking, doesn’t he? He doesn’t give half a shit about helping his friends (Elena, all vampires) with finding the cure. He’s too focused on killing Klaus and has a whinge about how the cure would make the hybrids revert to the hell of involuntary werewolf turning. Selfish.

The sword is apparently useless now that they have Shane’s knowledge. Way to kill off a MacGuffin.

Oh, and Carol dies. I’m sad.

Reasons to watch:

But her death is an amazing way to end the episode. She drunkenly calls Tyler for a lift, and Klaus confronts her, drenched in hybrid blood. She begs him not to hurt Tyler as he’s all she has, then Klaus is like “and you’re all he has” and drowns the crap out of her. Poor love.

Speaking of blood and drenching, Klaus fucking destroys the hybrids. It’s great. He uses the sword and goes all decapitation fabulous on them. Loved it. No mercy.

Klaus’s love of painting also re-emerges this episode. Because he’s just that classy.

When Stefan raids Klaus’s safe to find the sword, he instead finds various letters from people Klaus had killed. It’s his version of Stefan’s names wall. And Klaus tearfully says that they remind him of his inhumanity and his loneliness. Layers, man.

I’m gonna stop bitching about Stefan and Caroline’s girl time now that it looks like they’ve formed a serious partnership. And they get shit done together. If TVD needs a scheme team, I’m happy with this one.

As soon as Elena enters the lake house where Bonnie and Shane are helping Jeremy, he immediately tries to stake her. I lol’d.

Jeremy grabs best line while under hypnosis and asked how he feels about Elena: “She ruined our lives.” Yes. Yes she did.

Damon is comically obvious about his mistrust of Shane. He calls him both “Professor Shadypants” and “Doctor Evil.” I totally influenced that.

Shane says that the cure is buried with some scorned, immortal witch named Silas or some shit. The plot thickens.

April finally gets partway up to speed on Mystic Falls’ monster infestation. So it looks like she might no longer be the Magikarp of the TVD character roster.

Tyler finds the dismembered bodies of the dead hybrids. I lol’d.

Stefan makes a good point (when having a wangst sesh with Caroline) about how the only difference between himself, Caroline, Elena etc and Klaus is that they have a family they can trust. Is that a reverse Not So Different? Self awareness points for you.

And Caroline hilariously bursts his bubble by immediately following that statement with the revelation that Damon didn’t let Elena go last episode and has been hanging out with her all day. Bonus points because Damon actually is getting his shit together and letting Elena go at that exact same time.

The Vampire Diaries Stefan mad angry

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About ijusthateeverything

Sincerity is death.

5 responses to “TV Review: The Vampire Diaries Season 4 Episode 9”

  1. Karen says :

    I am a hug fan of the Vampire Diaries. I watch it religiously every week. I just found your blog and I wanted to say thanks for post.

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