TV Review: Pretty Little Liars Season 3 Episode 21
You’d think an episode of PLL where there’s a discovery of a dead body, a sinking of a police car to hide evidence, and the psychotic breakdown of one of the Liars would be pretty stellar.
You’d be wrong.
As was I.
TL;DR It’s weird. All the elements are here, but everything just feels a bit “meh.” Probably due to Aria’s domestic drama reaching saturation point.
Nice one, Aria.
Well, here are our plot lines this week:
Aria, as you could have guessed, takes even more leaps and bounds into the “who gives a fuck, just fucking dump Ezra already you stupid dick” arena. Maggie and Malcolm, Ezra’s son, turn up in Rosewood following Mummy’s decision to sell their condo. Ezra has a great time with his son. Aria does not. This culminates in her openly questioning her future with Ezra. Maybe she’ll do the right thing after all. She also helps Hanna dump Wilden’s car in a river.
Speaking of Hanna, she dumps Wilden’s car in a river. A plants it in her garage. Unfortunately, the dashboard camera recording has been messed with, so she can’t find out what happened to his body. Bummer. Ashley initially freaks out over possibly killing a dude, but ends up convincing herself he must be alive. I’m not so sure.
Emily, having finally been told (along with all the Liars) the truth about Toby, is in disbelief. She tries to track him down, but ends up empty. She does meet one of Toby’s work friends (who has his truck) and catches a glimpse of Red Hoodie. Other than that, she’s just a bit of a whiney pain in the flaps.
Spencer gets the best plot points this week. She finally spills about Toby, which leads to A threatening those she loves. The threat appears to have been delivered upon: Spencer tails Mona to the woods where she finds (what appears to be) Toby’s dead body. Mona escapes, but Spencer loses her fucking shit and ends up being institutionalised as a wacked out Jane Doe. Good times.
Looking at the plot rundown, you’d expect there to be some acceptable level of excitement this episode. But there just isn’t. I already assumed Toby was dead ages ago (and it wasn’t as spicy as I’d hoped). Red Hoodie continues to be frustratingly (instead of enticingly) elusive.
And Aria, as is her seemingly only capability, is still bringing her domestic crap in way too much. Now she has to deal with being a pseudo-parent? Fucking dump Ezra!
Why I hate this episode:
Ezra’s gotta go. Seriously. Can you imagine how liberating that would be? Actually, just kill off Aria. Make it a clean break.
Emily cunts around again, all disbelieving about Toby being evil. Bitch, we’ve seen it. Stop making a fool out yo’ self.
Spencer’s break down is just ridiculous. Really, Spencer? You can handle thinking that Toby has been sabotaging your entire life for years and putting his dick in you while secretly wanting to destroy you, but you find one dead body and it’s off to the asylum you go? Toughen up. It’s not like it’s the first dead body you’ve seen. Remember Ian? What? Nobody does?
Coming in at a close second for “most absurd overreaction” is Hanna, who thinks it’s a fantastic idea to dump Wilden’s car in a shallow river. This entails both keeping it a secret from Ashley and breaking Ashley’s explicit orders not to tell anyone (she has to inform Aria about Ashley running over Wilden so she can help her push the car). Rude. Dumb. I used to be able to count on you.
Maggie is looking to stay in Rosewood permanently. Ick.
Spencer stops seconds short of lifting the visor on “Toby’s” dead body to actually confirm it’s him. Goddammit, just get your facts straight before you flip your brain.
Oh, and Malcolm looks strangely ethnic, considering Alex Mack and Mr White Middle Class are his parents. Nobody seems to notice this. Or the casting director dun goofed. Either way, it’s distracting.
Reasons to watch:
At least 1 (possibly 2) characters are dead this episode. Spencer does find a dead body, but my bet’s on it being Wilden, and A has simply put a temporary version of Toby’s tattoo on it to trick Spencer. Death is fine in any form, though.
Despite how stupid it is, watching Hanna and Aria legit push a car into a river to hide evidence is a simple joy that I wouldn’t give up.
Points to Spencer for finally telling the Liars about Toby.
Points to A for (possibly) making good on their threat about doing that.
Mona is pretty involved this episode. She antagonises the Liars at the coffee shop. Later, Spencer tails her while she has a shitload of cash that she’s supposedly delivering to somebody. Then, when they get to the woods and Spencer finds the body, Mona gloats that he’s dead and then legs it. And looking fabulous all the while.
Emily, for the second consecutive episode, steals some computer time to get some deets. This week she slips onto her mum’s computer at the police station to look for info on E Lamb, Toby’s alias he used to see Mona at the asylum. An image starts loading, but we don’t get to see it. Tease.
Poor widdle Malcolm has a fall while Aria’s watching him. However, contrary to the insane furore I was expecting, both Ezra and Maggie are oddly chill about it. Ezra simply gets mad because he, too, has no idea how to be a parent. And Maggie’s kind of like “Whatevs” when she arrives. Well played, ABC Family.
Ella is sensible this week, too. Aria talks to her about her reservations with continuing her relationship now that Maggie and Malcolm will be around. Ella simply listens and tells her to do what she thinks is right. Parenting!
Best line of the episode goes to Hanna. Aria’s trying to convince her to reason with Ashley about the car and provides Ella as an example of how she might react: “Our mums are totally different. Mine hit the accelerator, remember?” Yes, Hanna, your mum is a pimpin’ bitch fucker. What’s the problem?
Toby’s work friend is sketchy as all fuck. I like it.
I lol’d when Malcolm got hurt. But you already assumed that.
Oh, and Hanna is thankfully back to her horrible dressing ways. She’s gone with an 80s lesbian look this week. The world makes sense again.